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23 [M4F] Germany/ Western Europe - looking for a solid relationship (Romantic/Platonic)
2023.06.10 21:01 OfEstablishment 23 [M4F] Germany/ Western Europe - looking for a solid relationship (Romantic/Platonic)
I hope you are enjoying the weekend.
I'm an introverted guy... I find it really hard to get intimate with someone... I have friends, really good ones, but no close ones. I suspect it's because I will die before I really open up to anyone. I want to change that, but habitually I am not able to do that physically, so I am taking this route.
Why I am posting here?
This platform offers me the opportunity to advertise to the other person what I am looking for and what they'd be getting into.
What I am seeking?
Someone I can be vulnerable with, I don't really know what it's like to be really vulnerable with a person but I want to give it a try as I am missing that connection.
It can be a friendship or more than that. I titled this post as M4F because I am single and would like to be with someone romantically and also I need to balance my friend circle by adding a female presence and pov.
I would really be fully content with a purely platonic relationship irrespective of gender as I value friendship more than any romantic relationship I had or would have. Obviously a good romantic relationship is a better friendship first.
Anything I am hoping to get from here, is intended to be solid and not just peripheral.
Who am I seeking?
Someone kind, empathetic, and understanding. Someone who is not judgmental and can accept me for who I am.I have given a description which I think should be enough for you to know if you'd like me.
Who am I?
As I said, I'm an introvert. I am pretty sure I have ADHD(not diagnosed).
If I am out and with people, I have this unease of going any step further than just acquaintances. I am friendly, and people are friendly to me more often than not, but it's probably because I live in Germany, lol. I am not shy, but I am distant and like my space.
Liberal and a centrist(but I love practical socialism)
Reject the idea of materialistic inheritance.
An atheist(except not arrogant enough to claim I know there is no God)
I mostly eat what I cook.
I love Cats and Dogs(do not have pets 😔).
Kind and paradoxically selfish.
I enjoy cycling and going on short treks.
I love being in nature.
Wish to retire near a forest and have an orchid.
Happy in less.
Smoker(intentions to quit), 420 friendly.
Do not drink anymore.
Idealize the "Golden Rule" actively.
Don't like to sugar-coat things, do not like to play games.
Very loyal(never betrayed even a friend)
Trust issues(working on it)
Bad fashion sense.
I am physically active but do not go to gym.
Literature I like – HP(love it madly), GoT, The office, Curb your enthusiasm, Seinfeld, Friends, Fauda, etc. Thriller and Spy shit is one genre I actively look for.
I left some things intentionally(to protect my identity) or unintentionally.
What is attractive to me?
Traits - Caring, loving, respect for space, understanding, curious, independent.Physically – Someone who is relatively physically fit, nothing too much.
I am a sucker for a good smile.
How do I look?
I am about 172 cm and 72kg.I would give myself no more than 6 out of 10.
Big no's for me -
Conservative, religious, unreasonable.
Shared interests are always a plus, but I am open to exploring new things and learning from each other, but nothing too out of my way.
I am not looking for anything casual or just a fling. I want something meaningful and long-term, but I am also not in a rush. I believe in taking things slow and getting to know each other first.
If any of this resonates with you, feel free to reach out. I am open to chatting and seeing where things go.
Thank you very much for taking the time to read my post.
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2023.06.10 20:59 LiamBrie Allergies?
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Hi, I just woke up from a nap and my arm was under a pillow, and when I woke up it has all these red dots on it that aren't going away (it's been a few hours), there's no itch or pain. I've never noticed being allergic to detergents or cleaners in the past, and while I'm allergic to dogs or most animals, those usually leave me with raised hives with no colour. Just checking if this is normal. This is photographed near my elbow. submitted by LiamBrie to medical [link] [comments]
2023.06.10 20:59 iLuv3M3 Half cups of Nitro Cold Brew - Grande?
Most times I order the Nitro Cold Brew - Grande through the app at different locations depending on where I'm at.
For the most part it's always a filled cup. However more recently I've been getting just slightly over half of a cup and I'm curious if that's on purpose or just because they filled it mostly with foam, let it sit and accept that's the nearly $6 cold brew.
Also, since this happened once, what can I do when they just decide to switch my order. The app let me order a nitro cold brew but when I arrived it was an iced coffee and they told me their machine was broken.
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2023.06.10 20:57 mattlork Feeling Stuck in an Empty and passionless Relationship, M18 and F18
I (18M) have been dating my girlfriend (18F) for almost 8 months, but I feel like our relationship is lacking fulfillment and excitement. Although I love her and I know she loves me, I don't feel completely satisfied with the way things are.
We don't engage in many shared activities together. we only hang out some weekends (whe she can) and they consist of only spending about an hour and a half together, and I desire more. I want her to visit more frequently, spend nights together, watch movies, have picnics, and engage in other activities. I have expressed these desires to her multiple times, and she claims to want the same, but she always seems to have other commitments or obligations that prevent us from doing more. It feels like she's making excuses, especially when I see her making time for other plans with different people.
I know she loves me but a good relationship requires more than just love.
Another issue is that we haven't had sex, and she doesn't seem interested in it. While I respect her feelings on the matter, it also adds to my overall dissatisfaction considering that I really want us to do it.
she also complains about these things, but she doesn't show genuine interest in making any changes. This frustrates me because I believe our relationship could be so much better and more passionate if she truly wanted it to be.
I dont know what to do. Breaking up is not something I want to do, but I don't see any signs of improvement in the near future, and it's crucial for me to see some changes if I am to truly enjoy being with her.
What do you think I should do?
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2023.06.10 20:56 0mabaPrism Bonus Riddles for Armor Sets
For those of you who, like me, really enjoyed the treasure hunting aspect of the game, I've been writing some riddles and puzzles that can act as a nudge in the right direction towards armor sets that have no quest attached. Anyone who doesn't want to scour the whole map but also doesn't want to look up the exact location should definitely read on.
Misko's Treasure of the Ice I
In Hebra, find the longest lake from north to south.
The treasure waits at the water's mouth.
Fly all the way up then turn your gaze down
To find the chest with the frost-ridden crown.
Misko's Treasure of the Ice II
Allow Strock's arrow to guide you to the garb wrought with winter's wrath. The shroud is stashed in the shelter of the shining shroom.
Misko's Treasure of the Ice III
Search below the coldsnap but don't plunge and don't fall. In order to embrace the winter you must first turn your head to the spring.
Misko's Treasure of the Inferno I
In the maw of the mount of doom
There lies a carved out room.
Should you choose to accept this quest,
Sharpen your senses to unearth the chest.
Misko's Treasure of the Inferno II
South of the salubrious springs, follow the finger affixed to the face of the mountain. Pursue the prize planted in the place to which it points.
Misko's Treasure of the Inferno III
Long ago in a land beyond time
The peak of demise loomed in its prime.
A boy known to wield a mythical sword
Became brothers with the mountain's stalwart lord.
Our kingdom immortalized the ruler's fame.
Find the crown east of the lake that now bears his name.
Robbie's Guide to Zonaite Processing
Read through Robbie's notes carefully in order to find the Zonaite Armor:
Zonaite begins as ore in a stone deposit. The trick to mining it lies in the wrist. Penance, alas, will come due for those who do not read my instructions with great care. To make your way up from this ore is quite complicated, so put on your listening pants. Start the pesky mining process simply by whacking the deposit, and so collapse the stone. Look closely and you will find what you’re looking for.
The next step is refinery, which requires a specialized tub. This tub is heated in the front to gradually melt down the ore. The first time I tried this, I put my ore in the refinery tub and the front erupted into flame, but I’ve moved up since then. Although I always wear a protective helmet just in case. Make sure to have a light cast on the tub before loading the ore to avoid my mistake. Again, follow my instructions to the letter and you’ll be successful.
The final step is the forging process. While it is nearly impossible to get ahold of a real Zonaite forge, I landed a deal with my old friend Quince, who helped me put together a makeshift one. Quince was actually the one who brought it up in the first place! Anyways, when depositing the refined Zonaite into the forge, be sure to wear the proper chest guard to protect you from your waist all the way to your neck. Ludicrous as it may seem, it’s very important in order to ensure your safety.
Good luck, and try not to lose an arm or a leg.
If anyone has any constructive criticism, needs further clues, or is able to find the armor using these, please feel free to comment. If there's enough interest in more of these I will definitely continue but based on my last few posts it seems like there might not be. Any more that I do write will be added to the post pinned on my profile. Good luck to all!
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2023.06.10 20:56 Icy_Huckleberry Shockingly can't Find Lynel
Currently pulling my hair out tryna find an Armored Silver Lynels that's Guarding an Ascent point in the depths near a Lightroot. I cannot for the life of me remember where it's at and was hoping someone could help.
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2023.06.10 20:56 Calm_Tone2935 How to get rid of house flies?
I dont know if this is the right subreddit to post this so if it is wrong i do apologise and will post in the correct subreddit but any advice from here i will heavily appriciate!
I live in south west london/surrey and for the past few years I have encountered so many flies and I dont know where theyre coming from, why theyre coming or how to get rid of them. I have gone to extreme lengths to get rid of them but havent found a solution. Ive bleached and cleaned every single inch of my home. I now keep the bins outside, I store all my leftover food in the fridge. Ive done nearly everything to keep these pests away but they keep coming and a large amount just circle my living room, kitchen and bathroom and they arent leaving. Ive tried killing them with an electric bat, industrial fly spray and a fly swat and as many as i kill they just keep coming back. What can I do, the buzzing is driving me insane and i feel disgusted in my own home?
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2023.06.10 20:55 Tayne-Crentist Klipsch ProMedia 2.1 Computer Speakers $40 OBO / Ceiling-Wall Projector Screen $30 OBO
2023.06.10 20:55 Travel_planner271 What Is A Homeless Voucher? Emergency Vouchers Explanation
| || |What Is A Homeless Voucher? submitted by Travel_planner271 to u/Travel_planner271 [link] [comments]
A homeless voucher, also known as a housing voucher or Section 8 voucher, is a form of housing assistance provided to individuals or families experiencing homelessness. It is a government-funded program designed to help eligible recipients secure safe and affordable housing.
The purpose of a homeless voucher is to provide financial support to individuals or families who are homeless or at risk of becoming homeless. The program aims to alleviate housing instability and provide a pathway to stable, long-term housing.
To qualify for a homeless voucher, individuals or families must meet specific criteria set by the housing authority or agency administering the program. These criteria typically include income limitations, household size, and a demonstrated need for housing assistance due to homelessness.
Once approved, voucher recipients are responsible for finding suitable housing in the private rental market. The voucher subsidizes a portion of the rent, making it more affordable for the recipient. The amount of subsidy is based on the individual's income and the local housing market.
Upon finding a suitable rental unit, the recipient enters into a lease agreement with the landlord. The housing authority or agency then pays a portion of the rent directly to the landlord on behalf of the voucher holder. The recipient is responsible for paying the remaining portion of the rent, typically 30% of their income.
Homeless vouchers can be a lifeline for individuals or families facing homelessness, providing stability and the opportunity to rebuild their lives. By reducing the financial burden of housing costs, the program helps recipients focus on other essential needs, such as employment, education, and improving their overall well-being.
It is important to note that homeless vouchers are in high demand, and there may be waiting lists or limited availability in some areas. Therefore, it is advisable to contact the local housing authority or agency to inquire about eligibility requirements, application procedures, and waiting times.
Overall, homeless vouchers play a crucial role in addressing homelessness and promoting housing stability. They provide an opportunity for individuals and families to access safe and affordable housing, ultimately contributing to their overall welfare and improved quality of life. What is a homeless voucher?
2023.06.10 20:54 sussingoutthenutters Summer on MN part ii; aggression towards the ice cream man
Seriously, I love shit like this. https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4824697-aggressive-ice-cream-man-blaming-me
This could be long, but I'm currently the subject of a local Facebook group, as two days after I was threatened and intimidated by the local ice cream man for saying something he didn't like about his conduct, he posted a long take of woe on the estate only group about the abuse he'd suffered from 'a Karen' on the estate.
I'm furious because he'd already upset me, but was so arrogant as if he was god's gift to the estate - 'all children love me for serving ice-cream, I'm here to make my customers happy, not you', but his parking nearly contributed to an accident.
His post has been unanimously supported with about 50 neighbours fawning over him and his ice cream, saying he's so friendly, cares about the kids, they get so excited, please don't let this vile cretin stop you coming.... But I wasn't at all threatening or abusive to him. It was the other way around.
I pulled up well behind him because he was blocking my drive, stopped right over the dropped kerb, opposite a junction. There were two cars parked further up ahead of him, where it was straight and to be fair, be does stop if he can. I waited and indicated (couldn't see me as he was serving through the side hatch) and a customer seemed to tell him he should move up. Before he did, a car approached me at speed, veered quickly around us all and then had to brake hard as there were kids crossing. They didn't know there were other cars in front, due to the height of the van.
After he moved and I parked, I went to get my bin and as I walked up he asked what he could get me, oblivious. Since he was the 'friendly local ice cream man' I asked if he could help out with the congestion by not blocking access, and tried to say what happened.
He said he'd moved and to get over it. I said yeah, thanks for moving, but still don't stop there again.
I got a mouthful of abuse - who do you think you are, why should I listen to a woman, ive been driving longer than you, ive done the job a long time, you're not my boss, noone else has a problem, how long have you even lived here, you didn't have to wait long, I'll park where I like, report me if you're not happy.
I stupidly went out when he pulled up the next day, this time partially blocking me in. He asked some nearby kids, who hadn't left as they sensed some drama from his tone, if they thought he was parked safely, as if this vindicated him. He encouraged them to film me and my 'aggression' towards him, still pointing and shouting at me. They were cheeky too, butting in to say my drive wasn't mine (?), Loads of cars were parked on the road, shut up moaning etc. He then asserted that these kids had come up to him to report how I always told them off. They denied this, 'nah it wasn't her, we just live on a street full of Karens'. I pointed out that other neighbours had said the drive blocking was becoming a problem, but he didn't seem to lose his temper with men. Ironically one of the kids piped up to say that what I said made me sexist... They got free ice cream and told to get their parents to send him the footage. Huge waste of time and energy.
He tells it that those kids had to tell me to leave him alone because I was so awful. Now there are people asserting that it was their kids and they came home upset about the aggressive lady.
It's not the whole neighbourhood, but if I'm somehow identified to one of these 50 who've lapped if all up (as nobody will say otherwise, it's just an echo chamber) I don't know what will happen.
I did speak to him. He was in the wrong. He went further. I didn't broadcast it and now I'm hated, and this man will still be right outside my house once a day when he chooses.
AIBU to report him to someone? Who? Should I try to set the story straight or stay out of it? Feel like I need to move, all because he's loved by kids for giving them sugar and it's unthinkable that he just didn't like his behaviour being called out.
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2023.06.10 20:54 MilkyButter42 Applied to a position with popular company, received text message that seems off?
So I applied to a position with a well known company in the US (nothing prestigious or anything, think retail but pays a little bit better than normal retail in my area) and a few weeks later I received a text message that says: “Hi Milky, My name is (they put their actual name) and we saw that you applied to our (actual name of position) position with (actual company name) and am reaching out to you to see if you are open to employment with us! We are currently hiring in your area. Please feel free to check out the link below for open roles near you... (Added link to job application that I already applied to)” Also sent a text that said “Reply STOP to quit”. How do I respond to this? They didn’t contact me through email or phone call, which I also provided, and to me this text kind of seems unclear. I guess my question is does this seem legitimate, how do I respond to this text, and where do I go from here?
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2023.06.10 20:54 hauloff My timeline. Could this be long covid?
TL;DR - Caught Covid in October 2022. Noticed sleep/tachycardia/anxiety symptoms 3 months in at new job/new apartment. Quit job 6 months in. Symptoms are reappearing despite zero stress environment.
Hello all, thought I'd share what's been going with me the past ~7 months or so and get some community input.
I'll preface everything saying that I definitely did not have a clean bill of health coming in. I've had long lasting nerve pain/burning feet for well over ten years, as well as a myriad laundry list of issues that come and go. I've had generalized anxiety since being a toddler.
I caught COVID late October 2022 at a family dinner. By sheer bad luck this aligned with the start of a new job and it delayed my start date by a few days. My old job, notably, was effectively zero stress. After my first day I drove back home and instantly noticed a cold, uneasy feeling that some people here have described as malaise. For the first 3 months of my job I decided to live and commute out of my parents house as it was marginally closer to work. Didn't really notice any odd symptoms that weren't prevalent before. Most notably I was sleeping (mostly) well through the night and waking up normally as I've since adolescence.
3 months into my new job I received a reprimand from my supervisor for not being as productive as I could which stressed me out. After that point I was always "thinking" and stressing about work, unable to take my mind off of it. Shortly after I moved into a new apartment. I had lived in this area near this apartment before for a few years during school and quite enjoyed it.
This is where things started going downhill rapidly. The apartment had a lot of noise as it was off a busy avenue. Noise did not bother me at all before in this area, as I routinely kept the windows open. After a week or two of living in this apartment I started waking up with an intense sense of dread and sickness in my stomach and I stopped eating breakfast before work. At work I had a terrible sense of "well-being". Everything felt very cold and "fake" and I felt uneasy. I remember walking around my neighborhood (I had lived here before) and felt derealization/depersonalization. I started sleeping less through the night, sleeping only ~5 hours and feeling unrested. I chalked this up to benadryl, an antihistamine, I had been taking 3-4 times a week for a few years now. I quit the benadryl and suspected I was having withdrawal symptoms. My preexisting burning feet problem was not helping.
Early April I started to contemplate quitting my new job. I started spending the weekends at my parents place, then my last week at my job I started commuting out of my parents place as I did before just so I could be around the comfort/familiarity of loved ones. I started waking up 4-5 times through the night every 90 minutes with my heart racing and anxiety through the roof. I took PTO two days the week before I quit, and remembering standing around in my parents house with my heart pounding through my chest, unable to calm down. Anxiety was 10/10. I contemplated suicide.
I quit my job the next Monday and finally was able to rest with a peace of mind. After a week I started to sleep through the nights again rather soundly. It should be noted I was still waking up with slight tachycardia and dread for most of this period. I started seeing a therapist and chalked this entire episode up as lifelong anxiety I've had since being a toddler. I confronted the fact that my preexisting issues even before COVID probably were connected to a constant tension from anxiety. I started doing lawn care maintenance at a property my parent's owned and Uber driving to keep myself busy and a small form of income coming in.
I gradually improved until this past week. A few days ago after having some caffeine I started to notice some brain fog/head pressure. Best way to describe it was my brain felt "scrambled." Difficult to focus on a task. The tachycardia and sense of dread/unease upon waking started to return. Even shortness of breath. I in a ZERO stress situation at my parents house and am continuing to have symptoms and am suspecting there is a deeper, underlying issues that is not resolved. Does this community have any feedback/second opinions on all this?
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2023.06.10 20:54 ActuaryPersonal2378 Developed a fear of driving, but I want to rent a car for a trip
I stopped driving in December 2020 when my car broke down and I finally sold it this year. (How it survived being dead -but permitted- in DC without getting broken into or stolen is beyond me).
Even when I had my car I hated driving in DC. It's absolutely terrifying - but I would drive for getting out of town or for errands that would take much longer using transit than driving, like going to the vet.
Now I'm completely averse to both driving and being in a car. As much as cars suck, this fear seems to have gotten a bit out of control. I've never even been in an accident (I've done dumb things like scrape a wall in a parking garage but nothing on the road, if that makes sense.)
It's even worse as a passenger. I'm at the point where I'd rather take a long metro ride than take an uber in situations where I would've gotten a ride at any other time.
I'm going back to my hometown this week and I really want to go somewhere that is about an hour away. I have the points to rent a car, but I'm admittedly very afraid to drive. I'm pretty sure it's been nearly a year since I've driven (August) and even the idea scares me. (there's no transit options)
It sucks because I actually used to love driving, but I'm so afraid of crashing or getting crashed into and injuring/killing someone or wrecking whatever car I'm driving.
I'm sure once you get back in the car it all comes back to you, and I do have to remember that it's particularly bad in DC and my home area is much less congested and people are better drivers in general.
Have other people in this group had to drive for the first time in awhile, and how did you navigate (no pun intended) any anxiety around it?
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2023.06.10 20:54 empathicsynesthete Joe gets on my nerves
I have seen all 4 seasons, but I realized just how much I hated Joe when I was nearing the end of the 1st season. This dude does NOT practice what he preaches, and yet he is so preachy. It pisses me off.
Here is an example of what I am talking about.
Joe cheats on Karen, the chick that he had a rebound relationship with after things did not work out between him and Beck. Yet when he and Beck get back together, he gets pissy when he finds out that she is cheating on him with Dr Nicky. He literally cheated in his last relationship yet he gets mad when someone does the same thing to him! It is pathetic.
Another example is his trainwreck of a relationship with Love. He rationalizes murder when he does it. But when Love commits murder, all of the sudden he acts like she is the worst person on the planet. He does the same thing that she does! He is just as much of a monster, if not even more!
I have no sympathy for Joe whenever he has to go through shit. He deserves it for being a pain in the ass
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2023.06.10 20:54 ticket-eater Need to exchange tickets for Henry Samueli Graduation
hey everybody I know this is super last minute but is there any chance that one of y'all would be willing to exchange a ticket near L102 Row D for my L121 Row J Seat 12?
Alternatively would anybody be willing to trade L102 Row D Seat 1 or 4 for a seat right next to L121 Row J Seat 12.
When I was booking tickets the website crashed or something and when I tried again I got 4 seats in a row and 1 random seat way off to the side.
If anybody has seats for sale nearby the two seat areas sections mentioned above or if you have seats you would be willing to exchange, please dm me ASAP.
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2023.06.10 20:53 Alternative-Dust6286 How to not let people from the past impact in the future?
After class 10, I joined a new school. Being introverted my entire life I decided to change things this time. I started talking to more people. During this time, I fell in 'love' with a girl. Deciding to propose I did so and was rejected, being the first time I did something like this I insisted and ultimately she insulted me and blocked me. The next few months I did nothing, tried to forget it. But fate had other plans, things took a bad turn at home and my parents separated, my mother took me and we went to a rental house near the school, her home was also near the rental house. Deciding that perhaps this was a god given chance to rectify things I decided to perhaps be able to regain her as a friend. One of her friends lived in front of the rental home and I decided to form friends with her to get my message across. I also formed friends with her other friends to make her realise that I was sorry. Day after day. I did the same. Over time, I learnt things about her, that though she told me that she wasn't into relationships, she had actually been in one, with a guy three years her senior. Her friends also teased her and a guy she is close to(he is also a new student) as potential gf/bf. I don't know why inspite of learning that I decided to pursue her as a friend. The next few months I did all kinds of stupid stuff, all my life I had been very quiet about romantic interests, this time I freely told her friends in hopes that she will learn about how sorry I was through her friends, as I couldn't contact her as she had blocked me. I tried messaging from alternative number but she just saw it and blocked that number too. Ultimately, I realised something her friends who I thought had a good connection with me too were taking all the information from me and telling nothing what she said about me, they were mocking me behind my back. I felt sad and told about it to one of them. The next day both she (the girl I liked) and one of her friends was at my doorstep, saying they want to talk, my mother was at home so even she came to know everything, they both insulted me. I came to know everything then. One of the guys of the new school, who was friends with me even before I met her had told her that he would accompany her to "threaten" me (he was previously very friendly and had even given me a photograph of her ex), this was but one instance, everyone I thought of as a friend had seemed to abandon me, I came to know that most of them were only friendly because they needed something to gossip about. I could do nothing then for the next few days, till the end of examinations after which I moved to a new city.
After a couple months, I decided to call them out, sent messages to the girl, she still has the same arrogant tone telling that she and her friends are better than me. I blocked her as I felt I couldn't really say anything to her as lots of things were my fault. But her friend who acted friendly with me, I insulted her after some time(I will not lie, it was nothing bad but just saying that she wasn't as good a person as she thought herself to be) suddenly from stupid I turned to villan, her boyfriend called to threaten me and even the girl( who I had proposed to) had her father call me threatening to get me arrested because I had previously messaged his daughter so much previously. Ultimately, I sorted all things out but I deleted my WhatsApp account, broke my SIM and decided to move from that life.
Fast forward to a year later, now I feel broken, I know those guys insult me still, calling me all kinds of things, mad, stupid, love fool. I do not care what they think of me, their time in my life has passed. I am afraid that someday in the future they may end up joining the same college as me and they will ruin my reputation there too as they kept on spreading my gossip previously, I am afraid that this situation shall never leave my life and even people in my future shall judge me from my past, I know I did lots of weird things during that time and even a brief while after that and I can't write everything down in this post. But I don't want that incident to chase me my entire life. I don't want the future to be like the past and I don't know what to do.
TLDR; I proposed to a girl, did all kinds of shameful stupid shit to win her back as a friend even though she hardly thought of me as one. Now, because of all those stupid acts I lost reputation and was treated poorly and fear that even in the future people from the past will impact my college life.
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2023.06.10 20:53 realsirenx is this a manageable issue?
i’m diagnosed bipolar but very much relate more to quiet bpd. i also have a fearful avoidant attachment style, so i struggle immensely with dating despite being self aware and very willing to change and grow. i have an extreme lack of trust, i split often and i deal with some level of psychosis. over the last two years, i’ve learned to become much, much more stable and to wait things out before reacting. i have in the past had a habit of breaking up or rupturing on a nearly weekly basis over things that feel quite real at the time, only to regret it hours later. i’m trying not to repeat this pattern now. so, i’ve been seeing someone for nearly 9 months. he is very, very sweet. in person, he makes me feel accepted and embraced. but he is also avoidant, and seems to lean more dismissive. we are both diagnosed with adhd and have our various struggles. my issue is with communication. he regularly takes many hours to respond to texts. this last time, he didn’t reach out for 2 entire days after abruptly abandoning a conversation. i’ve brought this up multiple times in the past but have adapted. he blames it on adhd, or whatever stressors are overwhelming him at the time. this isn’t a “is he cheating, does he like me” post. looking at the facts at face value, im truly trying to decide whether this behavior is unacceptable or not, because i struggle with determining these things on my own sometimes due to oscillating emotions. any advice?
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2023.06.10 20:53 Polaris328 Of Queens and Dragons
hi. reposting because i wanted to change the title and that's not allowed if i just edit the post. ok ok enjoy!!!
The Northstar, Titan's Orbit
Polaris, in the middle of a much-needed nap at his desk, looked up in a daze as his computer beeped, alerting him of an incoming call. He shook himself awake before answering. "Hello?" he said groggily.
"Hey, Old Light. Sounds like I woke you up," Crow's voice replied. Polaris could practically hear his protege's smirk. "Everything alright?"
"Just peachy." Polaris rubbed his eyes. "What's up, Crow?"
"Not much. I was at the Farm this morning and Queen Mara asked for you. I've been trying to reach you all day."
"Yeah, I've been, uh..." Polaris recalled everything he'd done in the past twelve hours: sleeping, eating ice cream, crying, trying to get some overdue mission reports done, then getting bored and sleeping again. "Very busy."
Crow chuckled. "I'm sure. Well, whenever you're free, drop by the Farm. Mara's waiting."
"I'll be right there. Seeya around, kiddo." Polaris ended the call and yawned loudly before getting up and changing into his typically pristine armor, though it found itself in a sorry state tonight. He pushed the button on his intercom and relayed his instructions to the vessel's pilot: "Set a course for the EDZ. Got business at the Farm."
"Expecting a fight?" Daedalus asked, orbiting his Guardian curiously. "Farm's pretty safe."
"No, but can't be too careful with Mara. She might have some kind of special assignment for me or something. There's always another one, no matter how many I have stacked up," Polaris grumbled, adjusting his cloak as the Northstar descended toward the Farm. It was as quiet as it had been ever since the mission of retribution against the Shadow Legion following Amanda Holliday's death. Some civilians of various species going about their business here and there, but no notable operations anymore.
Queen Mara Sov, sitting alone aside from one horse in the Farm's stables, glanced skyward as she heard the approaching roar of the Northstar's engines. Before long, Polaris made his way to her location. "It's been some time, Young Wolf," she said, stroking the horse's mane.
Polaris's face scrunched up for a second. "Still hate that. I see you've met Gorilla."
Mara frowned. "...Gorilla?"
"The horse. His name's Gorilla. He's a hero, y'know."
"What exactly did Gorilla do that was so heroic?"
Polaris chuckled. "Back in the Red War, during the mission to retake the Last City, the assault teams had to approach the City in a way that the Cabal wouldn't notice. So their ships dropped them out near Twilight Gap, and they made the rest of the journey on foot. But to make sure everything was clear along the way, they had a trio of scouts go ahead on horseback. Gorilla was one of those horses- along with his brothers, Elmer and Krazy, may they rest in peace. Without him, the assault team may have been ambushed along the walk to the City by Cabal forces. But thankfully Gorilla and his brothers were there to help." He walked over to Gorilla and scratched behind his ear. "He's been living here ever since."
"And what of his brothers? Elmer and Crazy?" Mara asked. "From what you've said, I assume they are dead."
"Krazy. With a K. But yeah. Krazy was killed by a Cabal sniper near the City's outer walls. He and his rider happened to be spotted while they were scouting ahead, and, well... a horse is a bigger target than a Guardian. As for Elmer, he was caught in an explosion during the battle. He survived it, but his injuries were severe enough that he had to be put to sleep, rather than letting him suffer for his natural lifespan. So Gorilla's the only one left. But he's been handling it well. Haven't you, boy?" Polaris smiled up at the horse, who gave a happy neigh in response. "So. What did you need? Crow said you wanted to talk to me."
Mara nodded, sitting down on a wooden bench. "I did. But I do not have a mission for you if that is what you expected."
Polaris took a seat next to the Queen. "Then what's up?"
"I simply wished to speak with you."
Polaris narrowed his eyes. "To what end? You don't do anything without a purpose."
Mara looked away from the Guardian. "Amanda Holliday's death has weighed heavy on all who knew her. As I said then, I have lived for eons. I have seen countless deaths. They still hurt, but it has become... easier for me, than for most. But it will never be easier to stomach how it affects those I care for."
Polaris swallowed a retort that probably wouldn't have gone over well, instead choosing to stare at the stable floor.
"That includes you, Polaris." Mara looked back at him. "So, if you insist that I must have a purpose, then my only purpose is this: I am concerned for you. A wish-dragon you may be, but your power is not infinite. Your shoulders have borne more weight than any of your peers in less than a decade. I can see it in your face- you are beyond exhausted. I know you do not see me as a friend, but if you have anything you wish to speak of, I will be here to listen."
Polaris covered his face with his hands for a brief moment. "Where do I even start?" He met Mara's eyes.
"Wherever you wish." Mara reached over and took hold of Polaris's hand. "I was speaking with Elisabeth Bray once when she said something similar to me. Then she remembered that a wise Hunter once told her, 'The beginning is usually a pretty good place.'"
Polaris's slack fingers closed around Mara's hand as a hint of a smile crept onto his lips. He shifted to be a little closer to her. "Using my own words against me. Devious, Your Grace. Very devious. Well. As you might remember, my friend Hecate went Dark a while back. She was a fugitive for a long time. Then, right after the Traveler ascended, she came to find me. She told me she wanted to come back to the City. Rejoin the Vanguard. I was all for it. She's doing great in rehab, but I can see the pain in her eyes whenever I see her. And I just don't know how to help. On top of that, Aunor and I... we're done. Again. For good this time."
"How did it happen?" Mara asked. "Another fight?"
"No. It was much more peaceful. We've barely seen each other recently. Been so busy with our own work that we... don't have time for each other anymore. But right before Titan reappeared, she and I finally got to be with each other again. First time we've been face to face in months. In the morning, she said we needed to talk. She basically told me we were too big of a distraction for each other. Even when we're apart, if we're involved with each other, we'd only be dividing our focus away from... 'what really matters,' in her words. Can't say I'm surprised- she's always put duty first- but to hear it spelled out like that didn't feel amazing. But I gotta admit... she's got a point."
Mara nodded slowly. "People like ourselves... we must always put the mission before our personal desires." She watched as Polaris's already somber expression saddened. "But that does not mean we must stifle our love for those around us. Amanda knew this, and she loved with all her heart."
"Cayde knew it too. But I guess it's a lesson some of us still have to learn, huh?" Polaris looked back at the Queen with a small smirk. "Not naming names, though."
A brief chuckle escaped from Mara before she caught herself. "Yes. I suppose we do. Although before we can express our love to those around us, perhaps we must first embrace and express our love for ourselves."
"It's always funny hearing you talk like that."
"What do you mean?"
"Like you don't want to be understood. And you want whoever you're talking with to understand that they don't understand." Polaris froze, panic setting in as he saw something change in Mara's expression. "Shit. I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"
"No. It's fine, Polaris." Mara chuckled again, more openly this time. "The first Queen's Wrath, Sjur Eido, once said nearly the exact same thing to me. You do remind me of her sometimes, though she was perhaps more... straightforward. There were fewer dimensions to her than yourself, but at your core, you're similar to her." She stared into Polaris's eyes. Today, they were electric blue, as bright and as powerful as a bolt of Arc lightning.
"How so?" the Hunter asked.
"You and Sjur are endlessly passionate. Powerful. Charming. Problem solvers, though in different ways. Always determined to follow your chosen path, no matter what might draw you away from it. In a sea of the exceptional, you both stand above your peers."
Polaris was suddenly very aware of the fact that Mara still hadn't let go of his hand, even though his own had gone lax a few moments ago- and that her tone had changed a little. And had she gotten closer? Or had he shifted closer to her? He couldn't be quite sure. "High, uh... high praise from you, Your Grace."
Mara paused before letting go of Polaris's hand and standing up. "And I mean every word. But... I suppose that is all I wished to say to you. You are free to go."
Polaris also stood. "Yeah. I'll do that. Plenty of work to do. But... thanks, Mara. For being here for me. And the same offer you extended to me goes back to you. Anything you need to talk about, I'll be here." He could practically feel that Mara wanted to say more, and so did he, but now was not the time. And this was certainly not the place. "Well. Uh. Oh, screw it." He pulled Mara into a tight hug.
Mara's eyes widened for a moment as she was taken aback by the gesture, but she instinctively returned it, closing her eyes.
"You said earlier that you didn't think I saw you as a friend. You were wrong. You are my friend, Mara. One of my best."
Mara felt Polaris's breathing synchronize with her own. The Prince of the Sky and the Queen of the Awoken silently stood in each other's embrace for a moment before she spoke again. "You must never forget to love with all your heart, Polaris. As must I. We do not know who will walk away from this battle with us and who will be lost along the way."
"I promise." Polaris stepped away from Mara. "See you around, my lady." He bowed to the Queen, only partially in a joking manner, then transmatted back to his Ketch.
Mara took a deep breath before looking back at Gorilla, who was staring at her. "What?" she bluntly asked the horse. Then she noticed it seemed to be looking just over her shoulder instead of directly at her. She turned just in time to see Crow drop his invisibility.
The young Hunter had an amused smirk on his face. "Haven't seen you like that since... well, you know. Are you thinking of...?"
Mara put a hand on her hip. "It is as I said. The mission, the plan... ending the Witness comes first. Why were you spying on us?"
"Couldn't help myself." Crow shrugged. "Truth be told, I've been concerned about him too. I was worried that you'd say or do something, or send him on some exhausting mission that would push him past the breaking point... but I was pleasantly surprised. I think talking to you did him some good. He seemed a little... I don't know. Lighter, when he left."
"If I have been able to provide some relief to him, then I am satisfied. Even if it is only a little. Don't you have work to be doing?"
"Heh. Suppose I do. And so do you. Bye, Mara." Crow nodded to his sister as he transmatted away.
"Goodbye, Crow." Mara walked out of the stable, breathing in the cool midnight air. She felt a little lighter as well.
hi. sorry for disappearing (again). i don't really know if i want to go anywhere with this particular relationship. i like the concept, but pursuing it actively would probably interfere with canon too much. we'll see, though. if you've got thoughts to share, please do so, i love feedback. anyway. got a little bit depressing today, which is probably telling. but there's a little glimmer of hope in there too. maybe something i'll need to come back to later. hope y'all enjoyed the story, though! see you starside, writers
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2023.06.10 20:53 Think_Shirt_8023 Handling nonsensical asks from manager?
Background- I am a low-level contractor at work-
my manager recently asked me to create an SOP for this huge project, which is well outside my job description, but also I received no training on how to do this and I’ve basically been doing whatever I thought was best, he’s not providing guidance
I don’t even know all the ins and outs of the project or who to talk to about those - it is really something that someone who is very familiar with and knowledgeable about the guidelines for it should probably handle
I also just found out that my manager disregarded advice from legal on what we can and can’t do, and was letting previous contractors break the law with what they were doing on it
I don’t really know how to handle these strange asks-
I just want to have my job and do a good job at the company
I was thinking of bringing this up to the staffing company that hired me?
I don’t want them to peg me as a “problem” or something though … ahh
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2023.06.10 20:52 loki2002 They have workout equipment at a local park near me.
2023.06.10 20:52 SoloPlayer869 28[M4F] # Timonium, MD - Looking for a FWB to sit on my face
I'm a 6ft, 240lbs, dad-bodish white male.
420 friendly and a big whiskey fan
Just a homebody looking for a chill, patient girl near the Timonium area to let me practice going down on her. What I lack in experience I make for with enthusiasm, or so I'd like to think.
I'm an attentive student and would like someone who isn't afraid to give some direction every now and then. It would also be a huge bonus to meet someone that I can hang out with from time-to-time, truly as a friend.
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2023.06.10 20:51 relevent_username2 Newish gamedev could use some advice on what project to work on
This feels a bit rude to ask people for their time but I could really use some advice.
I recently graduated from college as a computer science major, and while I already have a job lined up (in a non-gamedev tech position), because of the tech recession happening my job told me a few months ago that my start date was being moved back to January 2024. Luckily I have the resources to support myself up until then, but I figured I could use the extra time to do something I'd always wanted to, which would be to work on and release a full video game. This would be a smaller, solo-developed game made on a tight (near-zero) budget over a few months. I wouldn't expect it to be very long or for it to make much (if any) money, but I've always wanted to release something and worst case it could pad the resume a bit and give me a way to practice software development while I'm waiting for my job to start so I figured it'd be a worthwhile time. In terms of experience, I've been making games as a hobby on the side for a couple years now- this is my itch.io page
for reference. I have a fair amount of experience in Unity (about 4 years, on and off) and plenty of knowledge on programming but fewer art skills.
With all that said, I'm a bit stuck right now on deciding on which project I should work on. I have it narrowed down to one of two options at the moment. The first option would be a 2D puzzle platformer that focuses on manipulating and moving between negative space in the environment. I made a smaller version of a game like this
for a game jam and I always wanted to make it into a full game, with a heavier focus on puzzle solving, a story, etc. This is really enticing as I really love the mechanic here, but there are some pretty serious technical questions I'd have to answer to scale it to a full game, and I'm not sure if I could produce art assets that would read well when constrained to the mechanics- I suspect I would have to rely solely on silhouettes for a lot of the art in order to make the mechanic readable, and I'm not currently confident in my art skills to make that work and read as an actual set of environments.
The other idea was to make a game essentially about Zelda dungeons. The idea here would be to make a 3D puzzle game inspired by traditional Zelda dungeons, since more recent games in the franchise have strayed away from their traditional design and I've kind of wanted to make something in that space myself. This would be super stripped down relative to normal Zelda games of course- it would literally just be the dungeons, maybe even without combat. I've also worked on a smaller game
inspired by this idea, though admittedly I made that as part of a group. I did just finish working on this one though and have a lot of ideas, experience, and assets ready to make a full game, but I'm concerned about 3D development taking a lot more resources and time than 2D, which could hurt given I'd be making this game alone, even if my plan would be for it to be pretty short. I am still super passionate about this idea though and am debating between the two ideas.
I wanted to ask, would anyone have any advice for me on which project I should work on? I'm pretty new to making games in a full-time capacity and I feel like it's hard to judge where the scope of these things should lie. Could I get any advice on making my first game at scale? I would really appreciate it.
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