Baptist hospital lab patient

Hey everyone!
Sooooo long story short, I'm a rising MS4. I am on my last core rotation, which is pediatrics. Coming into medical school, I thought I wanted to do internal medicine. On internal medicine, I didn't feel like I actually got to diagnose anybody and that we were just putting a band-aid on people to send them home for them to come right back. I decided earlier this year I am going to apply into gen surg, and that was mainly because I had so much fun on my surgery rotation, and every single other rotation I had I either despised or was really boring to me. I was surprised on surgery how much medicine is actually incorporated into what they do, and I felt like I was getting my fix of IM. Additionally, I know I love inpatient medicine compared to outpatient - there is just something about being in the hospital I love. I am having a hard time deciphering whether I truly hate the clinic or not because every single patient is new to me, but as a practicing physician, I know that'll be different once you have established relationships with patients. I put pediatrics at the end because I felt like I'd never like peds. However, I have loveddd my pediatrics rotation so far. My team the first two weeks was so fun, and I really enjoyed getting to do diagnostic work-ups on the patients. As far as surgery, I really like the OR. I love the environment and the team-like atmosphere. But I have been comparing to other classmates who are doing surgery and they are absolutely enamored with the OR - a level that I am not at, but I do still really like it - I am just not intoxicated by it. Later down the road in life, I really want to do global mission work in my career, so I want to choose a career that will help me with that. That's part of the reason surgery appealed to me because I know surgeons can make a huge impact on those trips.
I am now having a crisis and I've got about a month to get this figured out. I am now thinking about applying into Med-Peds. I don't know if I ever see myself exclusively working with children because the diseases are just not complex enough for me, but I loved being in the Children's hospital and I think that exposure to pediatric medicine would be beneficial for global missions.
I have spoken to some people for advice, but I haven't yet reached out to any faculty yet because I don't want to show my cards unless I am certain. Any advice and thoughts would be great because I can't sift through my own brain right now.

I, 23f, started working as a nurse 9 months ago and have called out once during this entire period. I have been attempting to go part time as this will benefit my mental health drastically working night shift. I have a coworker (15+ year nurse) who calls out as much as she can (somehow always seriously sick with a cold), however it seems like she’s judging me for calling out for a personal day. She has even came to work and requested to leave as soon as it would no longer count as a call out multiple times. I was scheduled for a 4 in a row and planned on calling out halfway through (2 days counts as 1) and she says i shouldnt call out unless i have a legitimate reason otherwise id be leaving the team short for the heck of it. Mind you, the most our hospital will allow us to have is 5 patients and that has only happened to me 2x throughout my entire duration of working there. We are also in pediatrics, after 10 pm most of our pts are asleep, and they usually do a good job of dividing up night active pts, So our “short staffed” is the epitome of bearable. Long story short, she has guilt tripped me into working the 4 in a row and I know my mental health will suffer after this, but if i called out anyways, my entire night would be filled with me ruminating on calling out.
Also, the first day I got back from my first call out, she asked me (loud in front of the ANM) why I called out.
I have really thin skin and unmedicated anxiety/depression so these interactions take days, sometimes weeks to get over.

I made the decision to transfer to PACU after 5 years at beside and honestly I regret it. The hospital I work at is a level 1 and it’s so busy. From the start of the shift to the end we pretty much work nonstop. You have no idea when or what patient you are getting it just rolls into you bay. 10 mins later you can have another one. There are patients that the surgeons want the PACU nurses to ambulate multiple times before they can be sent up to their room. These patients usually stay for at least 4 hours. This would be ok if we didn’t have 70+ cases a day. The hospital will run out of beds and we have to board patients for hours. This slows us down tremendously. Some patients are required to stay 4-5 hours for checks and other issues even though they are stable. The other anesthesia units (IR, procedure, peds, GE, ambulatory surgery) always try to send us their overflow patients or boarders because they don’t have on call nurses. And on the weekend we get all the patients from every unit so we could end up doing 30-40 cases with 4-5 nurses. The turnover rate is high for the unit with most nurses leaving after a year. Couple people quit right after orientation and went back to their old units because it was better.

I think it'll take some time, maybe decades, before AI significantly replaces human doctors. As of now, I fully plan on finishing my MD degree plus residency, but I think it is possible that human doctors will start to be replaced during my lifetime (replaced = out of jobs entirely OR still working but with a significant pay cut). I'm thinking I should be ready to make a career switch sometime in the future, realistically probably something in biotech, but there are a few problems.

1. I have no experience with programming and in general, mathematical problem solving takes me a significantly longer time to learn and understand than most people in CS/biotech, which will be a huge disadvantage. I imagine at this level of advanced AI, most jobs will be highly quantitative.
2. I have no time to learn computer science/machine learning/AI while still doing medical school, residency, and patient care full time.
3. At minimum, the career I want would have to allow me to maintain the same income. Not sure how feasible this is, as most jobs outside of medicine don't pay 250k+ unless you're extremely skilled, extremely connected, or have decades of experience.
4. I have no idea what field I should be looking at. Most of the reason I'm going into medicine is because I find it personally meaningful. I'm willing to deal with the corporatized aspects of medicine because at the end of the day I'd still be treating patients. I feel "at home" in the hospital. I don't know of any job outside of medicine that retains that aspect.

Any advice?

I am 28 and will be applying to medical school for the first time this year. I have a bachelor's in biology and a master's in human nutrition. I am looking to find some technical medical job during this process which will likely take me a few application cycles. I'm not doing it for my CV, I'm just bored with the types of jobs that might fit my background. I like working in hospital environments, doing practical tasks, and talking to patients. During the pandemic, under emergency measures, I was trained to give vaccines. It was simple and repetitive, but I genuinely enjoyed the energy of a clinical environment and the brief but exciting patient interactions. I am OK with completing a quick certification program. Still, I don't want to expend too much time or energy on something I will only use during this application process. I'm looking for a job that I will genuinely enjoy, and that will provide motivation as I pursue a career in medicine. Let me know if there's anything interesting out there!

This might be unrelatable to most of you but I'll just rant because if I didn't, I'll lose my mind. I live in a country where everyone is calling themselves doctor without any degree that give them the right to use that title including lab scientists,nutritionists, pharmacists (with no pharmD) , physical therapist (with no dpt) and even nurses. And they just don't use it as a title they use it as a identity too so if I told one of them "are you a doctor?" they reply with "yes" even in a medical setting. To avoid confusion I had to replace the word "doctor" whenever I use it with the word "physician" but guess what? Now pharmacist and physical therapist go by the word "physician" and because doctors often work with pharmacists and physical therapists, there's literally no way for the patient to tell who's the real medical doctor. Uneducated patients don't know the difference between a pharmacist and a physician. I had a friend who prescribed a medication and the pharmacist give him another medication with entirely different mechanism without consulting the doctor and the patient trust him because "they're both doctor anyway". Patients go directly to the pharmacy asking for dignosis. now whenever I address this issue they call me arrogant and concending to their profession. Do I have the right to be mad or I'm just overreacting?
Edit: grammar and spelling

I think it'll take some time, maybe decades, before AI significantly replaces human doctors. As of now, I fully plan on finishing my MD degree plus residency, but I think it is possible that human doctors will start to be replaced during my lifetime (replaced = out of jobs entirely OR still working but with a significant pay cut). I'm thinking I should be ready to make a career switch sometime in the future, realistically probably something in biotech, but there are a few problems.

1. I have no experience with programming and in general, mathematical problem solving takes me a significantly longer time to learn and understand than most people in CS/biotech, which will be a huge disadvantage. I imagine at this level of advanced AI, most jobs will be highly quantitative.
2. I have no time to learn computer science/machine learning/AI while still doing medical school, residency, and patient care full time.
3. At minimum, the career I want would have to allow me to maintain the same income. Not sure how feasible this is, as most jobs outside of medicine don't pay 250k+ unless you're extremely skilled, extremely connected, or have decades of experience.
4. I have no idea what field I should be looking at. Most of the reason I'm going into medicine is because I find it personally meaningful. I'm willing to deal with the corporatized aspects of medicine because at the end of the day I'd still be treating patients. I feel "at home" in the hospital. I don't know of any job outside of medicine that retains that aspect.

Any advice?

I'm a PA student about to graduate and I've been going through the interview process with one large hospital system on the east coast. The position is for a swing shift and the way they described it to me is that there are 2 providers dedicated to doing admissions from the ED to the floor while covering rapids during certain hours on certain floors. They would be responsible for the patients they admit until the nocturnists come onto the scene. It doesn't sound like we round on patients or would be able to follow their care through the week. Is this a common model? I can't tell if this is a great place to start, get my feet wet, and learn a bunch, or if it will be grueling grunt work without real critical thinking.
Anyone currently doing a job like this and would you be able to speak more to the pros and cons of such a position?

I think it'll take some time, maybe decades, before AI significantly replaces human doctors. As of now, I fully plan on finishing my MD degree plus residency, but I think it is possible that human doctors will start to be replaced during my lifetime (replaced = out of jobs entirely OR still working but with a significant pay cut). I'm thinking I should be ready to make a career switch sometime in the future, realistically probably something in biotech, but there are a few problems.

1. I have no experience with programming and in general, mathematical problem solving takes me a significantly longer time to learn and understand than most people in CS/biotech, which will be a huge disadvantage. I imagine at this level of advanced AI, most jobs will be highly quantitative.
2. I have no time to learn computer science/machine learning/AI while still doing medical school, residency, and patient care full time.
3. At minimum, the career I want would have to allow me to maintain the same income. Not sure how feasible this is, as most jobs outside of medicine don't pay 250k+ unless you're extremely skilled, extremely connected, or have decades of experience.
4. I have no idea what field I should be looking at. Most of the reason I'm going into medicine is because I find it personally meaningful. I'm willing to deal with the corporatized aspects of medicine because at the end of the day I'd still be treating patients. I feel "at home" in the hospital. I don't know of any job outside of medicine that retains that aspect.

Any advice?

hi all, i recently took a drug test for a job and i had a very bad experience and i’m in search of some advice that could prevent it from happening again. to make a long story short, i tested positive for marijuana. i expected this because i use it regularly. when i left my last job, i registered as a medical marijuana patient in order for it to be easier for me to find work in the future, since my state (MA) has workplace protections for registered patients. well, the company that offered me the position cancelled my orientation due to the fact my result was positive. when i explained my disability and medical reasoning i was told that the lab that called me with my results should have asked for my medical documentation to prove this prior to them sending the results to the company. if the lab had asked me for medical documents i would have sent it to them but i know for a fact i wasn’t asked to send anything to anyone!! i was really disappointed by this and i’m scared of this happening in the future :( i was wondering if anyone has experienced something similar or even some advice to offer. any response is greatly appreciated, thank you!

I was recently hospitalized for over a week due to a manic episode. While in inpatient treatment, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. The doctor asked if I had any questions about it and I honestly didn’t so I said no. He didn’t really explain anything about the diagnosis. My discharge paperwork says “bipolar affective disorder, mixed, severe, with psychotic behavior.” Could someone explain a little bit about what those extra parts mean?
Also, I do have an appointment soon (as a new patient, not the same doctor) where I fully intend to ask the same questions and more. I just can’t stop thinking about it and want to get a little insight here. Thanks.

Is anyone else scared every time they try a new medication?
I've had migraines since I was 5, they've gotten worse as I've gotten older. I have a constant headache and my migraines can last weeks. I consider myself lucky when I have a migraine free day ever. I've been trying different medications, and lifestlye changes, since I was 9 years old. I tried going to a chiropractor ages 7-14, and acupuncture for a couple months. I've never gotten pain relief from medications and recently had a horrible in patient hospital stay. Most medications don't work as low doses and then I have horrible side effects but no benefits when they get upped.
My family really wants me to try Botox and I'm so scared at the thought. Any needles or injections have just caused worse side effects that I already experience with my normal migraines.
Just wondering if anyone else has an experience similar to mine with how my body reacts to medication or just the anxiety of new meds.

this is our family's first time dealing with someone with dementia. i was reading the medicaid faqs and its stated that loved ones can apply in behalf of the patient if they have POA. my mum doesn't have POA yet and i really wish she took care of it sooner, my dad is deteriorating real fast the past few months.
he's currently in the hospital with my mum. the doctor asked my mum yersterday, when he's better, does she want for him to go back to her house or to a nursing home. we all agreed as a family that its best for him to be in a nursing home. as of today, my mum is still waiting to hear back from the hospital floor manager for more details. im not sure how they will determine which nursing home or facility to place him in. im also concerned about the finances but we figured we will just wait until they get back to us.
i told my mum its best that she apply for medicaid in his behalf just so we can be better prepared. but she doesnt have a POA yet.
what should be out next steps? can the doctor help us with medicaid application even if my mum doesnt have a POA yet?
thank you everyone.

Introduction: Artificial intelligence (AI) is the simulation of intelligent behavior in machines that are programmed to perform tasks that typically require human intelligence, such as visual perception, speech recognition, decision-making, and language translation. AI can be used in various industries to automate and improve processes, reduce costs, and increase efficiency. In this article, we will explore some of the areas where AI is already being used and where it has the potential to be used in the future.

1. Healthcare: The healthcare industry is one of the fastest-growing areas for AI. AI can analyze patient data and provide clinicians with insights that can help them make better decisions about patient care. AI-powered devices can also monitor patients remotely, reducing the need for hospitalization and allowing patients to recover in the comfort of their own homes. AI can also be used to develop new drugs and treatments, helping to improve the overall quality of healthcare.
   
2. Finance: AI is already being used widely in the finance industry, where it is used to improve fraud detection, automate trading, and provide personalized financial advice. AI can analyze large amounts of data, making it easier for financial organizations to identify patterns and trends. This, in turn, helps them to make better decisions and reduce the risk of financial fraud. AI-powered chatbots can also provide customers with personalized financial advice, improving the overall customer experience.
   
3. Education: AI has the potential to revolutionize education by providing personalized learning experiences for students. AI can analyze data on student performance and provide teachers with insights into how to improve their teaching methods. AI-powered chatbots can also provide students with instant feedback on their work, improving their overall learning experience. AI can also be used to develop new educational content and provide new ways for students to learn.
   
4. Automotive: The automotive industry is undergoing a transformation, with AI playing a key role in this transformation. AI is used in autonomous vehicles, making it possible for vehicles to navigate roads and highways without human intervention. AI can also be used to improve vehicle safety, by analyzing data on driver behavior and providing feedback to help drivers improve their driving skills. AI can also be used to improve the overall driving experience, by providing personalized recommendations on routes and destinations.
   

Conclusion: In conclusion, the potential applications of AI are vast and varied, with the technology already being used in many industries. The ability of AI to analyze large amounts of data and provide insights that would be difficult for humans to identify is transforming the way we live and work. As the technology continues to improve, we can expect to see even more exciting applications of AI in the future.

So early In may i had one of the worst stomach aches of my life. Laying on my bathroom floor moaning in pain, the whole 9. I ended up driving myself to the ER and lo and behold, gallstones and lots of them. I knew I had this issue as I used to be really fat and my doctor explained this is how it goes for the large lads. So I lost a bunch of weight in 2020, got my health in check and thought I was done. Fast forward to 2023 and the doctors are saying they want to remove my gallbladder. I did the typical dumbass patient thing and thought "let me get a second opinion. I've done all this work. Surely I can keep this shitty organ that is causing me pain" and I really did not like the idea of going under. A month(almost exactly) later it had a small rupture causing me to spend 4 days in the hospital getting that surgery and another to remove mobile stones. What could've been 1 day in the hospital turned into 4 because I thought I was good and I'd be fine for a month to decide. Glad I didn't die a stupid death but if I could go back and slap myself I would.
For those who have also had it removed, when did your intestines stop acting like an expressway?

Grandpa has dementia. He is no longer mobile, he is wheelchair bound and on most days barely coherent (in very late, end stage dementia). Last night he "fell" at his place, in quotes because I'm not sure how he fell since he is wheelchair-bound. Per usual protocol (it is a legal requirement he be sent to the ER for a fall), Grandpa was sent to ER for his fall, but this time he was admitted instead of being immediately sent back to his memory care facility like usual. Grandpa was admitted for another issue they discovered that has since been treated and is under control.
When Grandpa was more coherent, a phase that lasted a year and ended four or five months ago, he was very active and a trouble-maker, constantly trying to stand up, physically attacking people, falling. He's been in the hospital for falls so many times people stopped showing up, because he'd be readmitted to his care facility merely a couple hours later.
Grandpa is clearly not in his trouble-maker phase anymore. How did he fall? Was he trying to stand up? No one knows, but my family is living under the assumption that he must still be in his troublemaker phase (he's not) and are now insistent on sitting vigil by his bedside 24/7.
One of my aunts has been up at the hospital for 9 hours, now my mom has been up there for 9 hours and my aunt is going to force my mother to spend the night.

• Both my aunt and mom have serious medical disorders, and both also have sleep disorders.*

All grandpa has done during his time at the hospital is sleep. He has barely been awake. He shows no signs of getting up.

• I believe my relatives are falsely stuck in the mindset that Grandpa needs to be watched every five seconds.*

What I'm asking is, is this normal behavior for family to feel the need to sit vigil every waking second of the day and night, with no sleep, for a dementia patient that barely shows any signs of activity, and no signs of aggression? Am I really an asshole for wanting my mother, and my aunt, too, to go home and get some friggin sleep???
I am really upset because my relatives have serious medical issues that require sleep, yet they are refusing it.
I think my family hasn't accepted that Grandpa's trouble-maker days are far behind him now.
AITA? Also, all advice is welcome.
Thank you.

Introduction Artificial intelligence (AI) is a rapidly growing field that has the potential to revolutionize numerous industries and make life easier for people in a variety of ways. AI has already made significant progress in many industries, from healthcare to finance to automotive manufacturing. Its applications are far-reaching and have the potential to transform everything from transportation to communication to education. This article will explore the various industries that have implemented AI technology and how it is being used to make a difference in people's lives.
Healthcare One of the industries that have seen significant growth in AI is healthcare. In this field, AI is being used to help doctors diagnose and treat diseases more effectively. AI algorithms can analyze vast amounts of data from medical records, lab results, and other sources to help doctors make more informed decisions. AI is also used to monitor patients in real-time, alerting doctors if there are any changes in vital signs or other indications of potential problems. Many hospitals are utilizing AI-powered robots to perform surgeries with greater accuracy and efficiency.
Finance Another industry that has seen significant growth in AI is finance. AI algorithms are being used in finance to help with fraud detection, credit scoring, and investment management. These algorithms can analyze vast amounts of financial data in real-time and make decisions on behalf of investors. AI has also helped make trading more efficient and helped banks comply with regulations more effectively. In addition, chatbots powered by AI are being used by banks to provide customer service, allowing customers to get answers to questions and assistance with transactions 24/7.
Automotive Manufacturing An industry that has seen significant growth in AI is automotive manufacturing. AI is being used to help speed up the production process, reduce waste, and improve quality control. AI-powered robots are being used to assemble vehicles, and AI algorithms are being used to monitor the manufacturing process for potential problems. AI is also being used to develop autonomous vehicles, which have the potential to revolutionize transportation and make travel safer and more efficient.
Conclusion AI has made significant progress in many industries and has the potential to transform numerous others. Whether it's in healthcare, finance, or automotive manufacturing, AI has shown that it can make a difference in people's lives by helping with diagnosis, treatment, fraud detection, credit scoring, investment management, manufacturing, and transportation. As AI technology continues to evolve and improve, we can expect to see even more innovations and applications in the years to come.

i’m gonna be a sophomore at uw-madison and the transition from high school to freshman year was rough. but i want to commit to being a serious pre-med or pre-pa student from here on out. i wanted to ask uw students how you guys are getting your direct patient care hours. i’m gonna take a cna course this summer, while working a summer camp and pharm tech job (hopefully soon) on the side. i’m also gonna do some hospital volunteering but i feel really behind. i really want to gain clinical experience and shadowing asap but it’s been really hard to find. so if you guys could say your advice i would greatly appreciate it !!

TL; DR: I have a full robotic laparoscopic hysterectomy with bilateral salpingo-oophorectomy scheduled July 12, and i can’t believe my nightmare is almost over 🥲😭✨🙏🏻🙌🏻
TW: brief mentions of SI/SH thoughts & SH actions, psychosis
i am a very feminine mid 30s non-binary person and in november had my first discussion about a gender affirming hysto. Gyno was reluctant to remove my ovaries due to age/not on other HRT. A completely reasonable thing. She was trying to gauge if I would be comfortable on feminizing hormones since i cannot take masculinizing ones (like no joke - my BODY knows it’s non-binary. tried to go on T, severely allergic. had to come off. every time my hormones switch around during my cycle, my brain loses its shit. it just wants to chill as is.) The answer to that question was yes, which would have lead her to then agreeing that yeah, let’s take it all.
Apparently, (i back tracked the dates) I was at day 20 of my cycle, aka Peak Irrational Bitch, and took her completely wrong. I felt like she was trying to get out of helping me. I tried to explain my PMDD symptoms, and she accidentally referred to it as “pms”, and i felt completely dismissed and unheard. I fully shut down at that point. Just was a sobbing mess. I was so confused because every local trans group has held this doc in high regard for her kindness and understanding.
Fast forward to April - I had been off work for 4.5 months due to a mental health crisis in january, trying to so hard to work on getting myself to a place i can function again. the gender affirming stuff had been put on the back burner, and so my therapist and i hadn’t finished my final needed letter for insurance. And then my PMDD got so bad it caused a full psychotic episode. I was in a “delusional state of mood congruent psychosis” for 5 days. Once my period started and my brains came back, i knew i had to address the pmdd for my mental health to improve. I saw my therapist right in the middle of that 5 days, and then 2 days after it ended, and she just kept saying “i’m so glad you’re back. i was really scared.” i had never experienced psychosis before, it was absolutely terrifying.
After this, is when i started back tracking my cycle dates. the day i admitted myself to the hospital in january? right at end of my luteal. My horrible SI & full autistic meltdowns with severe SH the last few months? only happening during luteal. and it all made sense. So my therapist finished her letter that week. I met with my psych NP and we came up with a better game plan (aka take all the klonopin you need 😹) for future cycles. I have had one luteal phase since, and thankfully only had about 20 hours of psychosis that cycle. I was so afraid of triggering it, that i avoided all emotional thoughts or feelings the entire luteal phase. Still severe irrationality, anxiety, SI/SH thoughts, SH actions, etc. But not as bad as april.
I met with the surgeon again on Thursday. I was so nervous she wouldn’t want to take my ovaries out, but after realizing I likely was in a place of severe irrationality in Nov, decided to go in as if this was our first time meeting. She was the exact sweet, understanding, kind doctor that the local community had stated. She was very understanding of me wanting everything out, and happy to hear i was okay with taking estrogen. She documented my psychosis symptoms, and said that she has rarely had a patient with such severe/treatment resistant pmdd, and supports my NP & Therapist’s conclusion that the psychotic features were due to the pmdd. I felt heard and validated, and the only difference was where my brain was in my stupid cycle. (I actually had initially scheduled with her on day 22 of my last cycle, but then when i realized when i called and rescheduled for day 8 of the next one)
Next week starts my FINAL luteal phase. The last one!!! EVER! Y’all i can’t express my relief. I know i have a lot of mental health work still to do, but now i won’t be terrified of having an emotion for 2 weeks a month.
When talking to my NP friday, i said “okay so my next… no… my LAST luteal.. 🤩” and it was such a great realization.
I’m going to miss out on some things i was really looking forward to this summer, but i’m okay with it. I think it’s all going to be worth it. I’m more excited about no more luteal than i am about no more dysphoria inducing periods, and that’s saying a LOT.
I have lurked here a lot, and i am so happy to share this celebration with y’all. any tips for me, i welcome them ♥️

This is a hard pill to swallow.
When I was eight, my granny's cousin came to visit. I have never met this guy before, I walked downstairs to make my brother and I cereal and he was there. My granny was upstairs on a call, mind you that I wore a cartoon nightgown. I chatted to him alot and I still blame myself for that, he started touching me, my breasts and my crotch and kissing my neck. He made me touch his shaft, I didn't know what was going on or what was happening. He told me: "I'm teaching you what your boyfriend is going to do to you." All I felt that day was fear, disgust and sadness, I froze up, too afraid to scream. He opened my legs and nearly entered inside me but my brother, at the time was six walked in. Frighteningly I told him to eat his cereal while I washed out all the evidence, (Big mistake) he threatened to kill me and quickly left. I ran upstairs and got dress crying, I sat on my granny's bed waiting patiently for her call to end. I remembered that Michael Knight was playing every Sunday morning on TV, when she was done. I told her everything, she cried called her friend back, called my mom and my mom rushed me to the police station. I spoke to the detectives and they tried to cheer me up but the minute I saw them arresting him I broke down and cried, the detectives put me in trauma unit and tried to calm me down while asking questions. I went to the hospital and they checked if I was broken into, but I washed all the evidence away.
Court took nine months, and therapy by court, I was in fourth grade at the time. My teacher felt sympathy for me. My classmates knew and in my community that is a scandalous thing, I was called ugly names by kids and girls told me it was my fault for opening my legs. I remembered my lawyers and even met a girl in court with a rape case who older than me (She was 12), we became friends, the lawyers didn't want to go into deep details afraid I was gonna cry like her but put me on camera while he was with a judge and my parents where there in my stead. The lawyers promised me nine years for him to go to jail for his crimes, I blamed that the judge and jury believed he's side of the story and gave him a warning and a restraining order.
Growing up, my granny told me not to tell the family, that she'll handle it. Nobody knew, I grew up thinking it was my fault. It's my fault I spoke to him, my granny said my beauty could attracted men into lust via Islam. (I'm christian who was a former muslim. A christian mom and a muslim dad) I dressed modestly and way too mature for my age, I avoided my stepfather and any men in my family. I blamed myself, I felt that no justice was done. I couldn't be around boys my age afraid they'll do the same, (In which the two case of molestation did happen on high school) every family function he was there and I would have to walk out of the house and cry while my brother comforted me.
My cousins started to notice a pattern, eventually I told them. My Granny was worried about face and her reputation with the family, it affected me badly. He acts like a true family oriented guy and so humble knowing he fucked up my life, breaking the court order.
I couldn't date, guys didn't want to be with a trauma messed up girl. I can't be intimate with a guy, I haven't gone to therapy because its looked down upon my community. In 2023, I saw him after the Eid in April when a family member died, my brother was fed up. He told me why didn't I told the court he was a witness, I told him that he was too young to understand and would cry if being questioned too much. I almost thought he did something to him (The guy) when burying the body in Islamic rights since women dont go to the graveyard, but luckily he left it.
Today I visited my granny's father's family. And he was there again, he's wife was there too. She always give me glares and dirty looks to say it was my fault. My granny comforted me, when serving food he served me a plate after I said continuously no thank you. I lost my apatite and was very uncomfortable, I told my cousin who hasn't seen me since the incident why I looked down but didn't go into detail.
I tried talking to my mom but it's always a hush hush topic because she's a rape survivor and she doesn't know how to handle my case if she had to endure silently. Rape and molestation is a victim fault situation since we have the biggest female genocide and rape in the world one year. I feel angry, sad and disgusted with myself. Some men will tell me wearing a night gown provoked him, but I was eight.
I slowly got over these feelings, by bottling them up. I am comfortable around guys my age but not with older men accept a few. I have a boyfriend of four years, and we worked together with this issue where I'm comfortable enough to be almost intimate with him but he will never do it unless I'm mentally and physically sure.
I dunno what to do. I know nothing is going to help, telling people will give me pity and people don't know how to treat me. I don't know if therapy is going to help since the few I met weren't patient enough even if I'm fully open with them and willing to work on myself. I want people to know I'm not that fragile, though he's in my face like a free man, live goes on. But seeing him unlocks the feelings on that day, I still remember, the date, day and time but I forgot his name. Then after a while I forget his face until I see him again.

So my mother and I rented an Airbnb right by a very large university hospital because I was getting major surgery. I'd have to stay close to the hospital for two weeks post op while I recover because we live far away. The airbnb was not particularly cheap for the area either. When we arrived a few weeks ago the place is not in good condition, the bathroom door is broken around the handle, the front door is all worn away but at least still locks, blinds broken, and everything just looks like it had white painted on over a very beat up apartment with zero repairs. Whatever, I can manage, especially because I would be in the hospital. First night there, the shower nob to turn it on completely breaks off. He takes FOUR days to fix it. There are no duvets in the duvet covers so no blankets. Minimal kitchen equipment even though it was advertised as stocked with utensils, oil, etc. Once again, I was nice because I was in the hospital so we weren't really there. Then I get home from the hospital a week later and get into bed and a painting comes down off the wall and almost destroys my newly constructed spine. Not great.
And finally, three days ago the wifi starts to get really spotty. It's advertised in the booking as high speed internet and a good workspace. Then yesterday the internet tv (no cable) stops working. I spend an hour trying to fix the TV with no luck. Though I did get it to turn on again which it wasn't doing for a while. Did power cycling, soft and hard reset, etc. Contacted the host yesterday because I did want to give it some time and try to fix it myself. He says "he'll try to swing by tomorrow and restart the router" (which is not in the unit or I would do it myself). Now it's 2pm and no wifi or TV for almost three days. I'm in surgery recovery with some serious restrictions so literally all I can do is watch TV. He's right by the hospital so he gets a lot of patients staying here and has multiple units in this building.
I've contacted the host twice now about the wifi and he's not particularly responsive clearly. Haven't heard from him today at all. Basically I want to know is this a valid reason to complain to airbnb? Or is there anything that can be done? I'm literally just staring at the ceiling stewing in post op pain because I can't even look down to read a book. It just seems absolutely ridiculous.