There was a nightclub near where I used to live where the general vibe was 'Jersey Shore but somehow worse', the music was exclusively Pitbull's entire discography, "Get Low" and various remixes of Petey Pablo's "Freek A Leek", all spun by a DJ who was clearly too high to function. The targeted clientele ranged from CEOs to Jersey Shore types to college kids to people who resembled the entire cast of Trailer Park Boys, all packed in like sardines. Most people hated it but to me it was paradise.
Is there anything like that around here? I remember going to a club with a similar vibe on Bourbon St in 2019 where the theme of the club was that everything was green, but I haven't been able to find that club since then.

Does anyone here have an STR in the St Louis region? I see resources on the internet informing me about this region being a great spot for STRs and potentially being profitable. Would like to know what makes it an attractive spot. Look forward to anyone sharing experiences.

I am a sober gay who hangs out with a lot of sober straight men. And I find comfort in that. Too much comfort. I'm low key terrified of getting into a gay relationship bc that's a whole different level of intimacy I'm really not trying to get my heart broken over. Although recently it became very apparent to me that I need to start establishing gay connections here in St. Louis, bc I am also a codependent gay who gets into these pseudo-relationships with not just any kind of straight man, but abusive, narcissistic, man-child straight men who are all great and wonderful to spend all my time with at first. Until I realize they're fucking psycho, or maybe they're not psycho, but they're definitely negligent friends. And you bet your ass they all leave me high and dry once some girl shows up. Not like "ohh sorry bud, I'm spending more time with the lady tonight" It's just straight up GHOST. Or abruptly getting cut off... And tbh, I'm kind of over it...
The thing is I'm fucking afraid. I'm a firecracker and I think I'm way too psychotic to date. If I idolize Olivia Rodrigo, Taylor Swift, and Alanis Morissette, then chances are I'm an unhealthy person with way too much trauma that I'm all therapied and medicated the fuck up for. And I don't think Tinder or Grindr are very effective here. And I am in AA and go to meetings with other alcoholics in the area (hence the narcissists and douchebags to which there is no shortage of in our community). And I've gone to queer friendly meeting houses and all the gay men are like legit in retirement age that go there. I'm in my mid 30s. I would honestly just like to go somewhere where queer men or MSM men frequent in the area that's not all about drinking and clubbing and would be somewhere where I can actually network or like I dunno, go on float trips with, or something of that effect. And don't get me wrong, I have plenty of straight male friends who I have healthy bromances with and I am not at all going to stop having those. I just want to have gay men in the area who add to my happiness.
So if anyone wants to help me, if I haven't scared you off with my neverending boy problems, then please point me in the right direction... I also have hobbies... I like to game. I like classic films. I go running. I would be interested in joining a gay fitness group or like a sports league (although I'm not very good at any of that stuff) and tbh joining a gay choir sounds totally cringe but if I have to fake it till I make it, I will... Anyways, thanks for reading. Hope someone knows something I don't and would be willing to share with me...

I recently fell in love with sumo after watching sensei Seth's videos about it but I have no clue of where to start. It seems there are no real sources to learn sumo. No articles on technique, no books on Amazon, no clubs near St.Louis, and sadly no tournaments nearby. All I want to do is learn and form a club with like-minded people male or female. If you have any sources to learn or advice to give on any of these I would be extremely thankful.
For now I'm thinking of combining what I do know. Some wrestling and judo techniques along with Muay Thai clinching. If I'm on the right track please let me know.

Link to the master post
https://www.reddit.com/CFB/comments/13rssrf/bowls\_and\_the\_race\_for\_the\_mythical\_national/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web2x&context=3

Setting the Stage

​

Team	Record	AP	Coaches
Nebraska	12-0	1 (51)	1 (31)
Texas	11-0	2 (3)	2 (3)
Auburn	10-1	3	3
Illinois	10-1	4	5
Miami	10-1	5	4
SMU	10-1	6	6

​
Important games and other notes

• August 29th: Preseason #1 Nebraska and #4 Penn St were each granted an extra regular season game to play in the inaugural Kickoff Classic. The Huskers got revenge on the Nittany Lions with a 44-6 thrashing.
• September 10th: BYU lost its season opener to Baylor, 36-40. They wouldn't lose another
• September 10th: Illinois lost it's season opener to Missouri, 18-28. The Illini would run the table the rest of the year (including beating 3 top 10 teams in 5 weeks) to secure a B1G title and Rose Bowl berth.
• September 16th: unranked Miami lost its season opener to #16 Florida (in Gainesville), 3-28.
• September 17th: #3 Texas took down #5 Auburn 7-20 in Auburn. Both teams would win the rest of their regular season games from here.
• September 24th: Miami waxed #13 Notre Dame, and entered the polls for the first time as a result.
• October 29th: #2 Texas defeated #9 SMU 15-12. This would prove to be a de facto conference title in favor of Texas

Five teams entered the bowl season with national title hopes. Texas and Nebraska stood as the only two unbeaten, but as SWC and Big 8 conference champs, were tied to the Cotton Bowl and Orange Bowl and couldn't play for a de facto national title. Despite both being unbeaten, Nebraska was a heavy favorite to claim a consensus national title, having spent every week of the season being #1 in each poll. Waiting in the wings were #3 SEC champ Auburn who was heading to the Sugar, and #4/5 Illinois who was heading to the Rose bowl, meaning the top 4 teams in the AP were all heading to different bowls. Independent #5/4 Miami crashed the blue blood party and was paired up in the Orange bowl vs Nebraska.
​

The Bowls

Cotton Bowl #2 Texas vs #7 Georgia (January 2nd, 1:30pm EST)
The Longhorns path was simple . . . beat Georgia, then tune into to the Orange Bowl and root for Miami to pull off the upset, which would make them consensus national champions. The upset minded Bulldogs had other plans. It was a defensive slug fest, with the teams tied 3-3 at the half. The Horns managed two 3rd quarter field goals to lead 9-3 heading into the 4th. Texas muffed a punt in their own red zone late in the 4th and Georgia capitalized with a a 17 yard touchdown run by QB John Lastinger to deliver the Dawgs to an eventual 10-9 upset. Texas' title hopes were officially gone, while Auburn fans probably shouted "SEC! SEC!" as their conference rival's upset kept their national title hopes alive.
​
Rose Bowl #2 Illinois vs Unranked UCLA
Illinois spent all of September unranked, before shocking college football, becoming the first team in Big 10 history go 9-0 in their conference slate. They had a slim chance at a national title, needing Nebraska, Auburn, and Texas to all lose their bowl games. Additionally they would need the pollsters to give them more 1st place votes than Miami, which wouldn't be ideal since Miami would have the better bowl win. In any regard, unranked UCLA proved they didn't belong in the conversation in the first place. The Bruins raced out to a 28-3 first half lead and continued to pile it on in the 2nd half, in a 45-9 route. Illinois finished the game with 0 rushing yards.
​
Sugar Bowl #3 Auburn vs #8 Michigan (January 2nd, 8pm EST)
Auburn entered the Sugar bowl knowing Texas lost the Cotton, but now needed to take care of business and Miami to do the same in the Orange bowl, which kicked off around the same time. If those two things happened, it was assumed the voters would elevate them to #1 in the final polls. Michigan made them earn it. The Wolverines scored a TD in the first and led 7-0 at the half. Auburn used its rushing attack, led by the one and only, Bo Jackson, and its kicking game to claw back in it. Trailing 6-7 with 23 seconds left, Auburn kicker Del Greco made a 19 yard chip shot to deliver the Tigers to a 9-7 victory. I imagine they quickly looked for the nearest TV or radio to see what the Orange bowl result was to see if they're championship hopes were still alive.
​
Orange Bowl: #1 Nebraska vs #4/5 Miami (January 2nd, 8PM EST)
Tom Osborne was on the precipice of his first national championship as the Huskers head coach. As the #1 team in each poll since the preseason, all the Huskers needed to do was take care of 11 point underdog Miami, in their home stadium and they're your national champs. However, the Hurricanes had other plans. In what is considered one of the best bowl games of all time, it would become a game huge momentum swings. The Canes stunned Nebraska by racing out to a 17-0 1st quarter lead. The Huskers rallied with 14 in the 2nd, one coming off a trick play known as the 'fumblerooski, and then a field goal in the 3rd to tie it at 17. Miami countered again with two 3rd quarter TDs to lead 31-17. Then the Huskers rallied again with two 4th quarter touchdowns. The 2nd TD came on 4th and 8 from the Miami 24. With :48 seconds left to go in the season, three teams' championship hopes (Nebraska, Miami, and Auburn) hung in the balance. Tom Osborne had a decision to make: kick for the tie or go for 2 for the win. Thanks to Texas' earlier loss, in the Cotton bowl, a tie would be good enough for the pollster to vote Nebraska a consensus #1 as college football's only unbeaten. In a decision that would go down in both Husker and college football lore, Osborne elected to go for two to win win the game. Turner's pass to Jeff Smith in the end zone was batted away by Miami's Kenny Calhoun. The Canes pulled off the shocking upset 31-30, and put the college football world on notice as a new dynasty was born.

Final Results

​

Team	record	AP	Coaches
Miami	11-1	1 (47.5)	1 (30)
Nebraska	12-1	2 (4.5)	2 (6)
Auburn	11-1	3 (7)	3 (4)
Georgia	10-1-1	4	4
Texas	11-1	5	5 (1)

As a husker fan, this is a heart breaker, even if it occurred 5 years before I was born. Had they gotten the conversion, I'd argue this team would be considered on par with the 1995 team. Miami's monumental upset leapfrogged them from #4/5 in the polls to their 1st consensus national championship, and as we'll later see, that was only the beginning. This came much to the dismay of Auburn, who played arguably the toughest schedule in the nation, which included wins over #4 Georgia, #6 Florida (who beat Miami handily), and #8 Michigan. In fact, the Tigers didn't even jump Nebraska, who still received 1st place votes in each poll despite the loss. College football's lack of playoff or sanctioned national championship game was maddening to some but I have to be honest, I think I like the chaos and controversy better. That's what college football is (or at least was) all about.
​
Sources and other info
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1983_NCAA_Division_I-A_football_season
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1983_NCAA_Division_I-A_football_rankings
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MoNs0mdKAO8 (the end of the Orange Bowl)

So this is a question for anyone that has been to the Club STL Sauna (in st louis obviously).
So i'm a 'gay virgin' (havent done things with males yet) and im thinking about going to this male only nsfw sauna/pool thing called Club STL. I'm wondering if anyone has been there could tell me some things about it. Like what is the etiquette for this place? meaning is nudity fully allowed and what are the rules on nsfw activites? Can i wear my feminine clothing? What are the private rooms like? Is this a place where i can just hang out if i want to or will people EXPECT sex from me? If you have any other info you could share too id greatly appreciate, thank you so much <3

Headed up to St Louis this weekend to catch a birds game, does anyone know if there is any card shops near the stadium?

Thanks in advance for any recommendations

This got excessively long, sorry.
I mentioned it here before I left, but I did the Camino de Santiago! I walked from St. Jean Pied-de-Port in France to Santiago de Compostela. Took me about 37 days. I walked about 780km/490miles.
First: It was an amazing experience. Lots of highs and lows, lots of amazing scenery, lots of amazing people, lots of amazing food and wine. If you're thinking of going: do it, if at all possible. At least once a day (usually more) I had a moment of thinking: I cannot believe I get to be here. I cannot believe I get to do this!
I mean, I also got blisters (repeatedly), lost a toenail (possibly two, we'll see), I had a panic over where I was going to sleep that night a few times, the hostels had hard beds and were full of people who snored and people who kept closing the windows no matter how stuffy/hot it was, I've been home a week and I'm still sometimes stiff when I get up after sitting for a while...but it was worth it and I'd do it again in a heartbeat.
Secondly: while I really appreciated being able to go to Catholic masses at least twice a week and some of them were very moving, boy did it reinforce that I am Episcopalian and not Roman Catholic. The Vibe is just different. It's entirely possible that some of this is just the way Catholicism is done in Spain or even just that part of Spain, but even Sunday mass seemed...kinda perfunctory a lot of the time? I was surprised at how often they skipped the creed entirely, for instance. Communion was sometimes just put in a bowl that was passed around, and was only ever in one form--the priest drank some wine, but nobody else did. And we almost never sang?! I think there was maybe three times we did more than just a few alleluias before the gospel reading. Almost all of them did a pilgrims' blessing after the service, and the priests varied a LOT in how enthusiastic they were about this. Some just ended the service by reading it off at everyone there, some called us up afterward to ask where we were all from and make sure everyone heard or read the prayer in a language they knew. A Franciscan gave us all small stones with a yellow arrow hand-painted on them (he also preached a great sermon, based on what little English he spoke and what little Spanish I understood, as he went back and forth between languages). A group of nuns gave us colorful paper stars they'd cut out while praying for us. On the other hand, there were two churches where after the service, we got lectured on how the RC church is the only TRUE church of Jesus Christ. At one of them the priest specifically tried to convert me and a lovely retired gentleman who is CofE by telling us only the RC church had real apostolic succession, and I made eye contact with the CofE gent and we both nearly laughed. Oops. (The priest only spoke Spanish and was telling us this through a translator, which is probably a blessing because otherwise I don't know if I could've resisted replying with "Well we're both gay and don't think that's a sin, so I don't think you want us.")
(I did have a print-out of the mass in Spanish and English next to each other that I'd taped into my journal so I could follow along, which means I have learned some Spanish that is useless in daily conversation, lol. I also would pull up the readings for the RC lectionary in English on my phone--and there was multiple times I looked around and other pilgrims were doing the same. In related news: their daily readings are much shorter than the ones in our daily office lectionary!)
Thirdly, and possibly ironic considering my last point, I found that praying the rosary while walking (usually via a recording since I walked with trekking poles lol) was really meditative. I also found that when I was having a hard time walking (because it was hot, because my feet hurt, because I was tired, because I was lonely) it was useful to me to pray a decade of the rosary for other people? I would think of someone I cared about, then go into the Our Father etc, counting off the Hail Marys with my fingers; then think of another person, repeat. This had the positive side effect of loosening my death grip on my trekking poles and preventing numbness in my hands! It's funny that I started doing it as a way of distracting myself when I was not enjoying my walk, but when I look back some of my most spiritual moments were those times I was alone and sweaty and my feet were killing me, because I spent that time talking to God about (and asking the Virgin Mary to pray for) people I cared about. I also prayed for a few people I met on the Camino that I found personally unpleasant. This made it easier to be gracious with them when we were inevitably seated together at dinner another day. I should probably learn something from that, lol.
At churches doing daily mass in the evenings, they often did the rosary a half an hour before that. There was a couple of times that the people there (nearly always a handful of middle-aged and elderly Spanish women) were benignly confused by my presence until they saw the beads in my hand and my well-worn leaflet with directions and illustrations of the sets of mysteries. (I still can't say any of the prayers in Spanish, but at least I can usually tell which one they're doing!)
Third: there's an Anglican church and mission in Santiago! I was in Santiago for Pentecost, and while yes of course I went to mass at the cathedral (no huge incense swinging, alas) I also went to the tiny Eucharist at the Anglican mission--I think there was eight of us total including the priest, who was an American woman. But it was such a comfort to hear and say the words of liturgy that I know by heart. (And see a woman priest!) Her sermon connected the wind at Pentecost to the stream of pilgrims walking into the square in front of the cathedral, and noted that despite our different languages, we pilgrims understand each other's joy upon reaching Santiago.
The mission recently bought a pension (a bit like a small hotel or bed and breakfast) and I *think* they're accepting guests. I'm hoping that within the next few years I can spend some time volunteering there--I stayed in many hostels run by volunteers (sometimes locals, sometimes a church and/or nuns, sometimes another country's confraternity of St. James) and they were often my fave places to stay. More info on the mission: https://www.anglicancentresantiago.org/
Fourth: I saw a ton of really old, really gorgeous churches. It sometimes seemed like every tiny village had a startlingly beautiful church (of the ones that were open--some were only open for mass on Sundays, or twice a month, or not at all). I think the oldest one I visited was the Church of Saint Mary of Eunate from the 12th century, but many churches had bits and pieces that were that old or older. My fave church was the Cathedral in Leon (built in the 13th century), which I paid to get into twice (they kicked us out for siesta) because it was so beautiful I kept crying. The stained glass is just spectacular, but honestly everything about it is gorgeous--the cloisters had a series of fresco paintings from (I think) the 1500's of events from the Gospels and Acts that were natural in expression.
The Leon cathedral had amazing wooden carvings in the choir--every seat has a carving of a person from the bible. Praying the daily office paid off unexpectedly: I recognized Saint Simeon, not from the Latin version of his name, or the fact that he was shown holding an infant Jesus, but because the gold lettering around his head started "nunc dimittus..." I could hear the Evening at the Office recording in my head: "Lord, you now have set your servant free, to go in peace as you have promised; For these eyes of mine have seen the savior, whom you have prepared for all the world to see; A Light to enlighten the nations, and the glory of your people Israel."
Fifth: So, St. James the Apostle. He's alllllll over the Camino, for obvious reasons. So many statues and paintings, from cute cartoony images in logos of local businesses, to heavily-gilded statues in many churches. I admit to being amused at how often he was portrayed as an older man with a beard, because he was (famously!) the first Apostle to be martyred--beheaded by a sword on Herod's orders in the book of Acts. He was mostly portrayed as a pilgrim--a pilgrim's cloak, hat with scallop shell, a walking staff and drinking gourd. In a few churches, he was also portrayed as The Moor-Slayer--on horseback with a sword, about to take off someone else's head. St. James the Pilgrim felt like a friend, St. James the Moor-Slayer definitely did not. St James did not, while alive, kill anyone that I'm aware of; but he's the patron saint of Spain in part because of his miraculous help in a battle against the Moors that historians are pretty sure never happened.
A lot of the legends about St. James in Spain are...unlikely. There's just too many instances of "funny how nobody discovered this/thought to write this down until three hundred years later, when it was useful for the church/the current king."
Which means that I've personally spent a lot of time pointing out to people that while it's doubtful his actual bones are in the cathedral at Santiago, it doesn't really matter--so many people have made genuine pilgrimage to Santiago to venerate him that the place has *become* sacred to St. James, y'know?
But speaking of the cathedral of Santiago de Compostela, there's a fascinating contrast between the altar, with its multiple statues of St. James and an insanely over-the-top gold retablo and huge baby-faced angels holding up a gold platform, upon which is an statue of St. James about to slaughter someone; with the actual place under the altar where his supposed relics are kept. You'd miss the way to the relics if it weren't for the line of people. There's a small metal sign saying "entrada" above a humble stone stairway down to a narrow, low-ceilinged space, where there's a couple of steps in front of a metal grille and about five feet between you and a small altar with a fancy silver box on it.
When I went into the cathedral the day I arrived in Santiago there was barely a line, so within a few seconds I was in front of that box. Other people had pushed things through the grille: rosaries, bits of paper with prayers on them.
And there's no way around it: I had a moment of profound awe and gratitude while I was there, along with a sensation of Presence, a feeling best described as "Oh god, what if he's really in there." People were snapping cell phone pics and walking past me as I knelt and tried to just let myself sit in that Presence. But I was also self-conscious of how few people fit in that space and other people wanting a turn, so I left within a minute or two. I went to a side chapel that was open for Eucharistic Adoration, and not knowing what else to do, I prayed the rosary and did the evening Office.
I went back the next day, after the early morning mass. I read to myself the prayer that was in my credencial (which is originally from a pilgrims' guide written in the 12th century), but I changed it all to the past tense and a prayer of thanks:
O God, who brought your servant Abraham out of the land of the Chaldeans, protecting him in his wanderings, and who guided the Hebrew people across the desert, we ask that you watch over us, your servants, as we walk in the love of your name to Santiago de Compostela.Be for us our companion on the walk,Our guide at the crossroads,Our breath in our weariness,Our protection in danger,Our albergue on the Camino,Our shade in the heat,Our light in the darkness,Our consolation in our discouragements,And our strength in our intentions.So that with your guidance we may arrive safe and sound at the end of the Road and enrichedwith grace and virtue we return safely to our homes filled with joy.In the name of Jesus Christ our Lord, Amen.
(This isn't the exact version printed in my credencial, but I'm at work and don't have it in front of me.)

Demographics

• Gender: Female
• Race/Ethnicity: White
• Residence: Northeast
• Income Bracket: <$30k
• Type of School: Public (overpopulated in a poor area with basically no resources.)
• Hooks: First-Gen

Intended Major(s): Undecided
Academics

• GPA (UW/W): 4.0 UW
• Rank (or percentile): N/A
• # of Honors/AP/IB/Dual Enrollment/etc.: 0
• Senior Year Course Load: World History, Mandarin, Calculus, Physics, Intro to CS, English Lit

Standardized Testing SAT/ACT: Did not take
Extracurriculars/Activities 1. Princeton Summer Journalism Program (very selective summer program) 2. Hospital Volunteer, every weekend since freshman year (200+ hours) 3. CS summer program grant recipient 4. CS summer program participant (slightly selective, three summers in a row) 5. Babysitter - I debated even putting this but it was a solid job that took up a lot of my time 6. Brand ambassadocontent creator for a non-profit (~6 hours weekly) 7. Volunteered to give emotional support to elderly monthly for 3 years 8. Volunteered/organized a project to give healthcare workers letters and gifts during the pandemic
Awards/Honors 1. NSHSS 2. Young Leaders Summit Scholar
Letters of Recommendation
Rec #1: From volunteer experience, guessing the letter was a 6/10.
Rec #2: From my babysitting job, very basic, 3/10 (I was desperate for another letter but knew my teachers would’ve wrote something even worse)
Essays
I am a fairly strong writer, and I got my common app essay reviewed by multiple people including an advisor who loved it. The topic was pretty generic, and about my experience growing up in poverty and how it led to my experiences in computer science and cybersecurity
Decisions
Acceptances: * Baruch College (RD) * Brooklyn College (RD) * Hunter College (RD) * Penn State (RD) * St. John’s University (RD) * St. Joseph’s University (RD)
Waitlists: None
Rejections: * Barnard * NYU
Additional Information
I’m first-gen and had no idea how I would afford going to college. Thankfully I am able to afford nearly all my accepted schools with scholarships and finaid! I kinda wish I applied to more reach schools but I will NOT be dorming, so it worked out

A month after the Vilnus NATO summit in early July the Baltic states and Poland are frustrated as the other NATO members cannot agree on security promises such as a future application into NATO as soon as possible. Most NATO nations disagree as they don't want to cause a war with Russia with the whole of NATO.
After the summit there was moving of Troops near the Belarus and Russian borders. On August 25th 2023 Poland and the Baltic presidents make an announcement that they cannot stand back any more and if the US and Europe will not stop Russia they will. This soon shows incursions into Russia and Belarus.
The rest of NATO is shocked and tries to get them to back down. This doesn't happen.
Putin announces a few hours later that the West has shown its true colors and has declared war on Russia and activates a mass mobilization order and nuclear weapons on highest alert.
The next day Russia launches multiple nuclear strikes along the Baltic states and Poland border with tactical nukes. A nuclear strike hits Lyiv.
Poland and the Baltic states call on the invocation of Article 5 after these strikes but most of the NATO nations including US, Turkey, Germany, Netherlands, Canada, and Croatia vote against invoking article 5. Saying that NATO is a defensive alliance and Poland and the Baltic states caused this major escalation.
The United Kigdom denounces this action and declares war on Russia. The United Kingdom launches ICBMs striking St. Petersburg and Moscow this leads to Russia launching nukes destroying London and other cities in the UK.
In a span of three days Poland, Ukraine, Estonia, UK, Latvia, Lithuania, Belarus, and Russia are devastated by the nuclear exchange. The rest of NATO calls for talks with these nations remaing goverment but the peace terms are ignored by parts of these nations and fighting continues but is mostly skirmishes.
Russia, Belarus and the UK breaking into multiple factions. In UK's case Scotland, Northern Ireland, and Wales break away blaming England for causing the nuclear devastation.
Poland and the Baltic states are kicked out of NATO and the NATO and China are tasked trying to get the nukes out of Russia, Belarus and UK before they get into the hands into unwanted groups.
This is based off one bad scenario from a guardian article I read.
The article

I’m yearning for a flaky, buttery, yet salty biscuit.

Hi Diamond Dogs,
Recently I posted about a job interview for a dream job. I was verbally offered the job by the HM but HR pulled the offer back because now they don't think I am qualified for it. I don't think I'm going to get it. My best hope is a lower paying job with the same company. It'll be another 5 weeks until they make a selection.
I applied to another job on a whim. It's in Buffalo. I thought it would be remote but it's not. The pay is about $40-60k less than the other two. The others are remote. I have never been there. I have never been there. I would be moving alone, single 30sF. I've heard that its a pretty tight knit community.
I havent passed the background check but they want me there July 30. I can push back my date to give me more time. I feel bad for doing that though.
Reasons why I want to move:It's a job and I'm unemployedI'd have to move back in with my parents in St. Louis. My parents want me to but there's a lot of shame and embarrassment that comes with it. Also, it can be dysfunctional with them (I love them dearly though) and I'm afraid that because my ADHD meds will run out that I will start binge eating again. I'm a recovering bulimic.
Reasons why I don't want to move:- Salary. I really want to save up and freeze my eggs. I'll have money left over for sure but I need to make as much money as I can because I dont have any furniture either.
- I really, really, want to make friends and date. I don't know if Buffalo would be a good fit for that reason. People say its a tight knit community and family friendly. I don't want to feel like the odd person out in groups or be so isolated from others because I'm an outsider with no kids.
- Ive never been there before and Id be leaving California.
I want to type more but Im really overwhelmed right now. Im sorry if this doesnt make any sense.
Thanks for reading.

Hello everyone! I am a 28 y/o bisexual woman looking for more queer friends! Bonus points if you're in the St. Louis area but I'm down for online friends as well!
I am passionate about feminism (fuck TERFS tho), reproductive rights, and a sleeping.
I have 2 partners. One is my nesting partner.
Feel free to reach out if you want more queer friends too!

It was a fine day in May and we pulled up and talked about some books. We covered Blitz by Daniel O'Malley and, because it was recently Mother's Day, I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy. And we spent way more time on them than we usually do, so we must have liked them. Quite a few people read the Blitz. Incorrigible_muffin had previously covered it, but was disappointed in the a payoff, and said the two story lines didn't really resolve. Aurora_the_Off-White said that she liked it, but agreed that it wasn't on the same level as the first two.
She said that Blitz could have a strong philosophical payoff even if the storylines didn't have an strong resolution. If someone read Blitz by itself without the first two novels, they might enjoy it more. Carbonjen thought there was a lot to like about the writer, saying he writes women well. Muffin said there were a lot of interesting possibilities in the world he created. The author covers the British and American versions of supernatural bureaus, but there were many of these throughout the world.
We talked about the story's structure. The main character's lost memory lets the author explain the supernatural elements in detail and do the worldbuilding without any distracting exposition. Munsontime had a thought, asking if it was technically the same person in the body or a completely new personality that developed after the wiped memory. If a personality is a product of the experiences and memories the person accumulates, then it's probably a different person.
Munson blitzed through the first two and is currently on the third. He was surprised at the spelling of the main character's name, Myfanwy Thomas, having listened to the audiobook. I was surprised and a little disappointed that the pronunciation is just "Miffany". Princess_MoNaanKay stopped by to return the first book int the The Checquy Files, The Rook that I had lent out. I thought she was returning it specifically because we were reading The Blitz, but she said she's decided to see other bookclubs. So we just need to move on and live our best bookclub life and hope she finds happiness.
Jennette McCurdy was apparently in a show called iCarly. I had never seen it or heard of it, so I think I missed a lot of context from the book. Everyone else in our group really liked the book - finding it insightful and funny. Most people agreed that the things the author's mom did stood out, and so did the actions of Dan Schneider, who was the creator of iCarly. But she didn't go into that in depth. Muffin said the system that pipelines kids into the entertainment business is fundamentally responsible for many of these abusive situations, and the actions of the mom are a product of that. Aurora thought that the author used humor to cope with loss and grief.
We talked about long wait times for getting books from the library. Carbonjen actually bought Tender Is the Flesh by Agustina Bazterrica because she was not optimistic about it becoming available through the library. She didn't have as many spicy romance recommendations as last time, but did have a couple. She thought Pestilence by Laura Thalassa was good and a fun concept. It's the first of The Four Horsemen series; a romance involving the four horseman of the apocalypse.
She liked The Siren a lot less. I think this was the one by Kiera Cass. Apparently the characters said the word "fishcunt" too many times and it became grating. She also didn't like how a lot of the characters in A Court of Thorns and Roses were developed in the story. She mentioned Brutal Prince only to say it was brutally bad, and is reading Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo and liking. And that makes Muffin happy.
Sassypapaya recently read Cloud Cuckoo Land by Anthony Doerr, which is very popular around these parts. I think she said she read The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller, and may have had good things to say about Lightlark by Alex Aster, or that may have been someone else. She was too far away from me for me to follow the conversation from that side of the circle very well. She asked about Verity by Colleen Hoover and Muffin said that Colleen Hoover was a step up from Stephanie Meyer.
Munson and his friends have a rule for their bookclub: you can't use the term "Beautiful Prose". But if he was forced to provide an example of beautiful prose, then he might use it when talking about Another Country by James Baldwin. He described it as "Kerouacky" - intimate and sexual especially for 1961. It's about the Jazz scene in NY in the 60s, with themes of race, gender, and sexual orientation in its cultural context. A slice of life story in the gay, black, jazz scene in New York. The Trial of Henry Kissinger by Christopher Hitchens is next for his other bookclub, Apparently Hank is bumping up against age 100. It was estimated that his cold-blooded policy directives are responsible for 4 or 5 million deaths. We talked briefly about Red Rising by Pierce Brown, which was the biggest book in the world for a minute. Munson said that, as a sci fi guy, he had already read many similar stories before and it just wasn't a big deal for him.
Assaulty recently read American War by Omar Al Akkad, and talked about how people end up on different sides of a conflict. Many times people don't have a choice about which side they end up on, and American War addresses some of these themes. She asked for more like this book. Asterion7 suggested Paolo Bacigulupi works such as The Water Knife and Shipbreaker, which are near future works with major themes of climate catastrophe. For this kind of thing I always recommend Afterwar by Lilith Saintcrow. Saintcrow a romance writer and I was really surprised by this book. It's gritty and hard, and a little spicy but not romantic.
Assaulty also read Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin and likes reading about creative partnerships like this. She told us about Nevada by Imogen Binnie, which is one of the inspirations for Detransition Baby by Torrey Peters; This Is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone; and The Way of Shadows by Brent Weeks, the first book of the Night Angel trilogy.
Muffin told us about The House of Eve by Sadeqa Johnson, the next book after the The Yellow Wife, which features Lumpkin's Jail. The House of Eve takes place in DC and Philly and ties in with the events of the first boo., The author will be giving a talk on June 8th at the Library of Virginia, and Muffin wanted to read this before seeing the author.

Please join us for a talk by award-winning author Sadeqa Johnson on her new novel, The House of Eve, the follow-up to her book Yellow Wife, which won the Library’s 2022 People’s Choice Award for Fiction. In this moving work of historical fiction set in 1950s Philadelphia and Washington, D.C., the stories of two women collide in unexpected ways as they both make decisions that shape the trajectory of their lives. The House of Eve was an instant New York Times best seller and was selected by Reese’s Book Club as the February 2023 pick. A book signing will follow the talk.
The Carole Weinstein Author Series supports the literary arts by bringing both new and well-known authors to the Library of Virginia through online or in-person events. Free and open to the public, the series focuses on Virginia.

Coconut read the second book in the Great Cities series by N.K. Jemisin called the The World We Make. Asterion7 picked up Trust by Herman Diaz, a Pulitzer prize winner. He also read We Are All the Same in the Dark by Julia Heaberlin and liked it enough to finish it, but not much more than that.
assaulty is looking for a gateway to Sci Fi, and asked about the distinction between Sci Fi and Fantasy. However many people there are in the room, that's the number of different opinions you're likely to hear at any given time. Some say it's magic versus technology. If Sci Fi doesn't have magic, what about Star Wars and force lightning from those Sith guys? So maybe Star Wars is actually Fantasy and Star Trek is Sci Fi. But what about wormholes and different dimensions and the super annoying character Q? It's a subject worth exploring, but there might not be an answer. To me those are just two different themes with strong aesthetic styling.
Assaulty may have read Parable of the Sower by Octavia E. Butler or it might have just been recommended to her because she is interested in Sci Fi and liked The American War. Skyvrbyvr loved Octavia Butler's Kindred giving it 5 stars. She says it's not just beautiful prose: she respects that Butler is not afraid to create gruff and real people - characters that are somewhat unlikable but somehow still relatable.
Aurora had a huge list of completions and I have no idea if these are all hers or not. But this month she read a bunch of first books across several series. I think heard Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo; Memory, Sorrow, and Thorn by Tad Williams the first of the The Dragonbone Chair series (I think she deemed it meh); Elantris by Brandon Sanderson also caught a meh; and Lies of Locke Lamora by Scott Lynch, the first of the Gentleman Bastards series.
The last one generated a lot of interest as a lot of us have read it and really liked it. Like The Checquy Files, the first book is fantastic and there are diminishing returns after that, though I haven't read the last two: The Republic of Thieves and The Thorn of Emberlain. Munson says that if you read Sanderson, then The Stormlight Archive series is the way to go. Aurora also has Circe by Madeline Miller on hold at the library.
We talked about a few books about music, I think all of these are from Munson, including Meet Me in the Bathroom by Lizzy Goodman: Rebirth and Rock and Roll in New York City 2001-2011; Please Kill Me: The Uncensored Oral History of Punk by Legs McNeil and Gillian McCain; and Sing Backwards and Weep, a memoir by the singer Mark Lanegan. We also talked a little about Nardwuar, a music interviewer who is amazingly in-depth but often described as offputting.
Munson says he can sometimes be invasive and not enjoyable but agrees that he is talented. Nardwuar is likely autistic and we were informed that "neurospicy" is no longer acceptable. Obviously, I'm cool with someone else deciding what they find offensive and following their recommendations, but I wish we had something to pivot to. We talked about how the line between normies and nerurodivergents can be pretty thin and while gatekeeping mental health can be frustrating, it's also infuriating that people resist any accommodation for neurodivergent people.
I knocked off a few books, including On a Night of A Thousand Stars by Andrea Yaryura Clark; Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata, and Gold Fame Citrus by Claire Vaye Watkins. The last was comparable to Station Eleven in terms of quality and themes. The story wasn't as good, but the prose was pretty exceptional. The author was able to do some things I hadn't seen before. I'm reading The City of Brass by S.A. Chakraborty, The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin, and listening to a couple courses about Human Pre History, First Civilizations, and pre-Alexandrian Empires.
Apparently George RR Martin joined the writer's strike and is not writing anything, not that you could really tell. We talked about the 8th season of Game of Thrones, and how those two producers just ruined at least hundreds of millions of dollars in sales of DVDs, downloads, books, and comics. One of the most disastrous effects of incompetence on a brand I've ever seen.
We talked about Patrick Rothfus's Name of the Wind and how the main character was a bit of a Mary Sue, but the narrator might have intentionally been portrayed as unreliable. Someone brought up Hope and Other Dangerous Pursuits by Laila Lalami, and we added The Moor's Account as August's non-dorky read. Some of the guys don't want to me call it a Muggle book anymore, and would rather call it a regular book. Maybe we need to keep looking for the right term.
We talked about books with actual paper pages versus reading on a device or listening to audiobooks. Carbonjen says she prefers the Kindle Paperweight because her dogs chews up actual books. I read paper, epub, and listen in about equal proportions. I was listening to Dodge, or Fall in Hell and was not liking it, but started liking it better when I flipped to the epub version. Munson says he uses safari reader on his laptop and will set it to autoscroll. We also compared strategies for downsizing our libraries. Very few people keep every book they buy anymore, especially if you have moved your collection a couple times.
We talked about the St. James Muse, trails on the James, the resurgence in skating, and art classes at the VMFA and Visual Arts Studio. We also talked about all the pedestrians being hit by cars and how squaring street corners can slow cars down. Right now corners are rounded, encouraging cars to take them at speed. And how dash cams are an essential equipment for cars now. Chop Suey is now Shelf Life and Wonton is now "Wonny". But has retired and been replaced by two new cats, presumably who are earning much lower, entry-level wages.
Someone brought up BookTalk.org, saying they mostly got ass recommendations out of it. I've used https://www.whatshouldireadnext.com and it isn't so bad, but really isn't any better than Goodreads. I've used Shepherd a couple of times, which can be really good if you're looking for exactly the type of book that has been covered in one of their lists, but it seems to only accept general categories.
Coming Up on June 18

• Fall; Or, Dodge in Hell
• or some other Neal Stephenson book

Coming Up on July 23

• Just pick a book in your To Be Read pile and tell us about it. We were lamenting the large backlog that each of each is carrying around and decided to just knock some of them out.

Coming Up on August 20

• The God of Endings by Jacqueline Holland
• The Moor's Account by Laila Lalami