Wife beater tank top mens

I came out three years ago, and since then I've come to the conclusion that ginger men are the sexiest. I never really had a type before, and when people asked me, I couldn't answer. But now I know what I like. Don’t get me wrong, what you like has to also match inside.. nothing worse than a rude and uneducated person.
Where can I find a ginger man to hook up with, date, or whatever? Do you have any advice for dating gingers? I'm a very boring bear, that is a top, with dark hair and eyes.
Thanks!

Sorry in advance for the length of this post, but I can't let it all just keep festering inside. Apologies for any typos.
Life has been hell lately and it's left me dwelling on something I really need to get off my chest.
When I was 12 I began being raped by a "friends" father. I won't go into all the details, but he first used coke, then eventually meth to keep me coming back. Make me willing to degrade and humiliate me in ways I can't allow myself to recall. When they surface I drink until I'm comatose.
The rape, torture and humiliation ended when I turned 14. By that time his wife had left him, taking his son along with her. To this day I don't know if I'll hug him if I see him or beat him to death.
In any case, that made him spiral, he'd always been a "functional" addict. Good at feigning normalcy while a monster his behind the mask. That mask wasn't on when I was with him. He nearly killed me strangling me with a silk scarf multiple times. Stuck needles in my feet. Between my fingers, sodomized me with objects when he was too high to rape me himself. Every session ended with him giving me something to keep me high till the next time. Like clockwork, when I ran out, I went over and he was literally expecting me.
This time was a bit different. He told me to come over the very next night. (I usually went over between 10 and midnight and snuck back in at 3 or 4. I always came in through the back patio door, but it was usually closed, unlocked, but closed. Tonight it was wide open. He didn't like me speaking unless told to, so I silently went through the house. It didn't take long to find him in the bathroom, dead. He'd overdosed. I didn't even touch his body. I just left.
I left in tears, sobbing. Because he'd fucked up my perception of love and intimacy that I genuinely thought he was my lover. Not my rapist, not my sadist.
I was saved, I was finally safe. I was also heartbroken and suicidal. When I got home, I tried to cut off my own penis with a pair of scissors but only ended up with a slice and a lot of blood. Then the detoxing started. After 2 years of stimulants and forcibly going cold turkey with only a basic understanding of what was happening to me. I was a wreck. I'd leave the house all day and just hide away from people crying in drainage ditches or off trail at a nearby park.
This all happened at the beginning of summer, by the time school started again, I was able to stay stable with the help of copious amounts of weed and Robitussin.
But it was my secret, my burden. My parents never knew, my friends never new. And I quieted the trauma by immersing myself in things that interested me. Easier to not think about yourself when your mind is focused on history, or physics, or world religions. It worked for far longer than it should have. But there was a darkness I was keeping at bay. I craved the feeling of being used, being hurt, being humiliated, being raped with no ability to fight back.
I liked women, and men, but I never pursued relationships because I could never trust myself enough to be who I wanted to be around others. Some of those friends I wanted to become lovers I pushed away and burned the bridges I had between them, all because I hated who I was, who I still am to this day.
Eventually I got sober before the drinking killed me. I opened up to my family about what happened, got therapy, got medicated. I even found kink communities I can enjoy myself at from time to time.
But in spite of all this positive progress, I still feel trapped. Destined to a life where the best I can hope for is being kinda okay most days.
Be comfortable being a deviant and damaged goods. And most of the time that's okay with me.
Now I'm not so sure. A dear member of my family nearly died and will be in the ICU for months in total before and after receiving a heart transplant. During the transplant she had a stroke and can now barely speak. It's killing my father taking care of her but he's too stoic to be vulnerable.
Then last week I got a massive amount of dental work done, 13 teeth pulled and 2 bridges. Less than a week later my backpack was stolen with the bridges inside. $3000 worth of dental work gone in an instant and it feels insignificant compared with everything else in my life.
Everything is fucked up and the world's on fire, and at times like this, all I can think of is the last time everything was fucked up and my world was on fire. I feel like I'm hanging on by my fingernails and I just want to let go. Grab a handle of vodka and jump in front of a train.
But I have a family that loves me in spite of all these scars, inside and out. I have nieces and nephews I want to watch grow up and have a normal happy life. One where there's not a monster of self destruction lurking deep inside. People I can guide away from my own mistakes, protect from the monsters that left me black inside.
But it's so hard right now. I never thought I'd say this, but I want to go back to just being depressed. Feeling nothing but emptiness is so much better than this.
So for now I just try to keep moving, day by day, hoping it gets better. I wish I was doing it for myself, but it's for all the others in my life. My mom, my father, my stepfather, all the kids in my life who I can be a positive influence on. I genuinely don't care about my own life, but I care about hurting them. But I just don't know how long that will be enough to keep me going.
Anyway, if you've read this far, thank you and I'm sorry. I'm not looking for advice. I just needed to put all this shit into words. Something about doing so helps.
To end this, all I can say is hold onto the ones you love. Sometimes they're the only ones keeping you from falling into that void. You matter to them, even when you don't matter to yourself.
That's all, Im off, I need a cigarette.

Curly Scents x Zaharoff OF THE IMMORTALS
Ambery, Musky, Woody.
A forest as loud as your mind is quiet. This fragrance isn't afraid to make a statement. Which is good because you have nothing of note to state. You're just an empty void echoing whatever is shouted at you in an effort to rise the social ladder. Just hold on to Daddy Zahoroff hand you won't fall.
Stay Fresh Productions x Zaharoff
Classification: Woody Aromatic Spicy
Classic, elegant, regal. A strong fragrance to make up for the fact that you have nothing of value to add to the world. Every joule of energy that comes from your being is just another disgrace the rest of us have to live through. Keep it together. Keep playing dumb. We know your not playing. Just wait for Daddy Zahoroff to cut that check.
TLTG Reviews x Zaharoff EVENING MYSTIQUE
Classification Aromatic, Spicy, Floral
A elegant skin scent that only your love ones will get to appreciate. It's just a shame you've chased them all away with your constant smugness and condensing attitude. They just don't understand that with no real achievements to feel good about you need to tear down others to feel like you have value in this world. But Daddy Zahoroff knows you have value.
Zaharoff Signature Leather Tabac EDP
Tough, confident, bold. Everything you're not. Spray as much as you want, they'll still see you for the square you are. Never seen a dead body before have you? How do you think you can be a great artist with so little life experience?

So my wife of 5 years is a wonderful and lovely lady. She is so smart, beautiful, patient and stubborn.
Every time she goes out grocery shopping she comes home as the amazing wife she is and puts the groceries away. HOWEVER. You know that spot on the fridge door on the top shelf that's just big enough to put a carton of eggs? Well lo and behold that where we put our eggs and the top of the carton sits a bit more than flush with the rail. Well when my wife puts things away she will often put other things on top of the carton, at which point the item is no longer protected by the rail.
Queue the pettiest of revenues. After opening the fridge door all week and having a whole container of blueberries spill out onto the floor, picking them up, washing them off and putting them back in the empty crisper. Everyday the package found its way back onto the eggs. So one night after the whole family fell asleep. I went to the fridge and wrote a letter to my wife... from "the eggs". With that note I stuck 5 toothpicks into the carton nailing the letter to the carton. Then I impaled a blueberry onto each toothpick.
The letter read something to the effect of...
"Dear MRS of the house, procuror of food and stocker of the sacred temple of freshness. I the leader of the ovum empire have reason to believe that you wish to antagonize us with your constant acts of war. We are delicate beings and will no longer tolerate any other civilizations to be built upon our shoulders. You will find attached to this letter 5 tokens of warning. We will not ask twice. Next time there will be war.
Signed the choosen one
To this day, she hasn't placed anything else on the eggs. However she routinely jokes about it.

A big talking-point by redpillers I see regarding the redpill/broader manosphere is that its adherents are brave enough to face the raw reality of gender dynamics/society, no matter how unpalatable it might be. Bluepillers are spoken of disparagingly for being blissfully ignorant or clinging onto comforting Disney lies.
Yet to me it's obvious that redpillers are the ones clinging onto a fantasy. This is clear by how quick they are to ignore/dismiss facts that don't align with their preferences.
A massive example I see with this is when speaking about female virginity/chastity and age gaps in relation to divorce rates.
Manosphere men frequently say that one of the biggest reasons they want to marry a virgin (or a woman who has not slept with many men) is because the divorce rate is lower.* This reluctance to add fuel to the risk of getting divorce justifies their stated preference for a virgin.
On the other hand, many men in the manosphere speak of their desire to marry a woman considerably younger than them, with many even saying that they plan on waiting until they are in their late thirties/early 40s, before settling down with a woman in her early-mid 20s.

• the first thing I would like to point out is how rare this is. The average age gap in many countries (US, Canada, UK, Russia, Brazil, Japan, most of western Europe, New Zealand, Argentina, etc) has the man two/three years older than the woman. Poor African countries have the largest age gaps in marriage (female autonomy is lower), and even then it is only 8 years at the most.
• If we look at US statistics, just 7.6% of marriages have the man 10+ years older than the woman.
• Women marry on average in their late 20s/early 30s (28.5 in US for the first time/almost 32 in UK), so even of those in age gap marriages, many won't be in their early/mid 20s.
  
• couples where one or both of the couple married very young (under 25) are more likely have a marriage that ends.
  
• Marriages are the most likely to last when the man and the woman are around the same age (and preferably both in the 28-32 age bracket), which is when people marry on average, so a lot of people seem to have naturally worked this out.
  
• on the other hand, 'A five-year age gap means the couple is 18% more likely to divorce. That rises to 39% for a 10-year age difference. When the couple has a 20-year age gap, the likelihood of divorce rises to 95%. A 30-year age difference means a whopping 172% chance of divorce.' - unhappy marriages.com
  

So my question is, why do men in the manosphere cling to facts when it suits their fantasy of a virgin wife, but ignore them when it comes to the reality of getting and keeping a considerably younger woman? Isn't this the opposite of facing the ugly truth?

I’m starting college this fall at ksu at the Marietta campus and dorm in hornet village. Could someone who has access to one tell me the dimensions of the top of the dresser preprovided. I have a fish tank and want to make sure it can fit comfortably.

I had my baby Monday by c section. I've been pumping while still trying to figure out how to get her to latch without a nipple shield. The nurses said I've got great production? I constantly leak milk. The pads in my breast feeding tank tops constantly fill up or slip slightly to one side and then the milk goes everywhere when I nap. My clothes are covered. My blankets have milk all over them. My mattress. My pillows. When I'm trying to feed the baby its dripping everywhere. I'm using clothes trying to catch it all but it doesn't matter. I give the baby to my husband to top up with my pumped milk or formula and the baby is covered in milk from the opposite boob or her fighting the latch (I am feeding 5-10minutes per side with the shield each feeding). Its all over her diaper making that wet as well. My boobs hurt all the time and I don't want to wear bras. I dont even want to wear these tanktops with the built in but a large shirt or naked isn't going to keep the breast pads on. I cant get in with my towns lactation consultant for 2 weeks and the nurses were at a loss as to why she wouldnt latch. She was 3 weeks early. I dont have inverted nipples. They said my boobs might just be too big, nipples not out enough with not enough give around them to get it in her small mouth. Her chin was tiny when she was born but i read it develops in the last 3 weeks and it does seem to be becoming more pronounced, maybe the chin is the issue? No ones mentioned her small chin to me, its just an observation. Is there something I dont know about for the leaking milk or any advice for the above?

First
Capes and Conundrums
“Alright, watch and learn kiddo.” Deadshot says as he brings his gun into position. “Most people think that a rifle is a point and click answer to their problems. Point, pull the trigger and problem solved. Those people are idiots.”
“Oh?” The Merc beside him says. Since Deadshot was categorically a solo act and maybe on occasion has some mooks to do the heavy lifting having someone hang around close would be an issue. So the excuse was he was training another sniper. Franchising as it were.
“Okay, really quick out of character.” Silicon says.
“Yeah?” Pavel asks.
“How the hell are you going to cause half of that construction to come apart with a bullet? I understand it’s not massively up to code, but at the same time. A bullet is small. It has only so much kinetic energy it can carry and if you bring Axiom into this you’re setting up a flare.”
“Architecture and physics.” Pavel says as he adjusts the gun and then leans away from it. “Look down the scope. It should start to make sense.”
“That’s one of the main cables of that sign. But there’s at least one more and it only needs one to stay upright.”
“Look at the angle, also remember I’ve got a reinforced bullet for this one. It’s designed to stay intact and ricochet.” Pavel says and Silicon rises up to look at the back of the sign again and mentally trace where the bullet will go.
“You’re going to shatter one support and weaken the other.”
“Yes.”
“That is an absurd level of accuracy.”
“When the Undaunted claim to be better than the best of the best, it’s not idle boasting.” Pavel states as he takes a full shooting position again.
“So what’s the event in question?”
“We’re going to move along five positions and they have to find our ‘safe house’ in the point between them all. For that we’re going to need to leave some clues at each one. This first position to let people know they need to look is going to have the bullet casing, the bipod and of course the imprints we’re leaving on the roof gravel. For the next one we’re butting a type of polish on our boots that will get easily rubbed off so they get that, the casing and the imprint.”
“Are we leaving three clues at each place?”
“Yes. Some more obvious than others. Which reminds me.” Pavel says before digging out and tossing a wrapped bar at Silicon. “Eat that. It’s the third clue for the third location. Each one gets a bullet casing and the imprint of us hanging around.”
“What’s the fourth clue then?”
“A novelty sticker from a nearby business. It’ll let all the girls on the case know that Deadshot is staying nearby and has at least a hotel room, if not a full on base of operations.”
“And the last one?”
“Hardest one of all. Only two clues. The imprint and the casing.”
“And the ultimate place is in the middle of all of it...”
“Not exactly middle, but a place where you can reach all five locations without being spotted on a camera. Which is why we’re going there and then back out to relocate each time. So I hope you’re ready to take the stairs, because we got cardio in our future.”
“Oh joy.” Silicon says before a small timer goes off and Pavel grins.
“Show time.” He says as he double checks the wind, tastes the air and then slowly squeezes the trigger on his rifle.
The rifle is silenced and therefore the first sound that the danger makes is the calamitous clang as the grip of the frist cable is shattered and the still very active bullet goes careening downwards and slams into the base that holds the second cable. Cracking it ever so slightly.
Even from their position on the building, both men can hear the screaming groan as the metal slowly gives before the sign suddenly collapses forward and slams into the ‘civilians’ that Deadshot was hired to kill.
“Time to go.” Pavel says rising up as he disengages the bipod mount.
“Really? We’re just going down the stairs?” Silicon asks.
“The elevators have cameras, and the stairwells only have camera’s above the doors. However, the five buildings we’re using are in the middle of a maintenance upgrade that was massively overbooked as about fifteen different buildings decided they wanted the upgrades all at the same time. So these five are at the end of the list.” Pavel explains as he walks down.
“But the older security networks...” Silicon says.
“Pardon, I should have been more clear. The removal of the old equipment is already done for these five buildings, the actual replacement parts are not currently available.”
“And since the stairs are rarely used the security cameras in here are the last of the last priority.” Silicon says and Pavel nods.
“That’s right. Now we need to be able to get to our next location in a hurry. So time to skip some stairs.” Pavel says as he jumps down one flight and then flings himself down the next.
Silicon teleports down to the bottom but only has a few moments before Pavel arrives. He then waves for Silicon to follow him and then leads him through the building in a very strange, roundabout manner.
“We’re avoiding all the cameras they have left aren’t we?” Silicon asks and Pavel nods as he casually exits the building. He also points up and Silicon sees many Sonir in the air, a lot of them in Batman outfits of some kind and clearly scanning the upper areas and completely missing the two men casually walking around dressed like Deadshot with one of them lugging around a gun roughly as big as he is.
“Hey! Hey hey hey! You’re one of the actors right? Playing a bad guy?” A young Sonir girl asks flapping up to them. She’s tiny, dressed in all pink and clearly has gotten into at least a small amount of glitter lately.
“That’s right. Is there something you want?” Pavel asks in amusement.
“Can I take a picture?” She asks holding up her communicator.
“Sure thing little lady.” Pavel answers and she all but throws herself at him and turns in midair.
“Say boogers!” She exclaims.
“Boogers?!” Pavel demands before he hears the little camera go off a few times and she slides down with a giggle to examine her new selfie with the supervillain.
“Thank you mister badguy! Have fun!” She says rushing off with a laugh.
“Well that was adorable. Let’s keep moving.” Pavel states before they cross the street and make it into an a mall. A mall where he immediately leads Silicon into a side passage that’s lacking any kind of signs whatsoever.
“Where are we?”
“The building layout had some design fails. There are unregistered rooms back here. Well... not so much rooms as unused space, gaps between the stores. No security, no cameras, not even on the registration.”
“So is this tresspassing?’
“Even if we hadn’t informed the owners and legally rented the space? No. The place isn’t technically on the building plans so even if we squatted here it wouldn’t be a crime. But since we’re renting it, as is, we’re not only allowed in here, but are the only ones allowed.” Pavel explains as he opens a semi-hidden doorway to reveal.
“A sniper’s lair.” Silicon notes.
“That’s right.”
“This is an almost unfair test. They have to figure out that you weren’t spotted because you avoided the cameras, then look at a building’s blueprints and find out that there’s one place with none whatsoever.”
“That’s right. This is what level four puzzle challenge is about. If they catch us, it’s a win. But catching us is the hard part.” Pavel says and Silicon considers.
“I mean... this seems a little... I don’t know? Unfair?”
“It’s a riddle. Not every problem is solved by shooting things or using brute force.” Pavel replies as he fetches his replacement bipod. “Alright. Time to go. After I fire my shot the girls will all be given a warning about the second crime scene. They can then trace the bullet trajectory to our new location.”
“I still say it’s asking a bit much of people.”
“It’s far more data than Batman in the comic gets.”
“I don’t think comparing people to a person who’s superpower seems to be hyper-intelligence and a hefty dose of denial is fair either.” Silicon notes before Pavel leads him out.
“Probably not.” He admits and they’re shortly out of the mall and climbing up the stairs of another high rise.
•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•
She rushes to the scene of the next crime. It’s just like the last one. Massive collateral damage, one shot. A single attack, a single actioan and dozens of lives are done. It’s meticulous, it’s brilliant, it can only be Deadshot with that kind of aim and...
“Hey we got one too deep here!” Someone calls out and she’s pulled out of her head.
“What? That... I what?” She asks and looks around. The mannequins in a state of placement. The ‘explosion’ caused by the perfect unleashing of a gas valve that was sheered by a bullet. It blew out the front of a restaurant and left it a mess with all the mannequins in pieces.
“You were brooding girl! I could tell! You were forgetting to pull yourself out!” The other Sonir says and she holds her head.
“I was, wasn’t I?” Damn that’s not good.
“You alright there Batman?” The Undaunted playing the part of Jim Gordon asks.
“Fine, I’m... fine...” She says examining the area again. She lets out tiny pulses of sound and hears the place. The tiny hole where the bullet went through. The scalpel precise sheering of the pipe. No actual restaurants here used gas stoves, so it HAD to be part of the entire event. But still...
She lets out a little click and then imagines a straight line going backwards. Directly from the hole. She turns and sees the top of a large building nearby lines up nearly perfectly with it. “Up there!”
That said she takes off and gains altitude fast. Climbing upwards on the ash flecked wind until she crests over top. Empty already. She lets out a supersonic pulse and there’s a shape far different from the rest among the gravel atop the roof. A little cylinder. One that still stinks ever so slightly as she leans in close.
She steps around the slight indents suggesting where Deadshot laid and sees a slight smudging of some substance on the gravel as well. She doesn’t know what it is but...
“This... what is the puzzle?” She asks herself out loud. “There has to be some kind of answer to this.”
“There’s something up with you isn’t there?” Another Sonir asks as she alights on the landing. She looks back to where more are joining. “If you want it to stay private, keep it in your head. We all have good hearing sister.”
“I...” She begins before swallowing it.
“If you’re not up for these challenges then you’re not up for them and that’s that, there’s nothing to be ashamed of. These are for fun. No one’s lives actually depend on them. There’s no one getting hurt if you don’t do them.”
“Except maybe her ego!” One of the other Sonir calls out and there’s laughter from a friend that lands beside her.
There’s another indicator of the next part of the scene in just a few minutes and they all get the address. A police dispatch stating that a vehicle has had it’s tire shredded and gone wildly out of control.
She stays behind a bit as she thinks. Before sighing and deciding to fly away. Not really feeling her best today. Although completely unsure as to why. Something’s up, but she can’t figure out what.
She sends a message that she’s bowing out of the rest of the little context and will not be taking part of any more for the rest of the day. There’s a brief moment where she smirks as she confirms that no, it’s not something The Undaunted have done, she’s just not at her best.
She swoops downwards and lands at street level in a few moments.
•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•×•
“Excuse me miss.” Pavel says as he moves around the freshly landed Sonir woman and she outright stares at both him and Silicon as they move towards the next sniping positin. “Something wrong?”
“I bow out of the competition and I stumble on you moving?”
“Life’s funny isn’t it? Sorry, but I have to go.” Pavel says before rushign away with Silicon in tow.
​
First Last
PS: I really need to figure out what's killing my motivation. My mind keeps wandering and I just can't focus. I don't want to start guzzling caffeine again... but this is getting out of hand.

I saw this listing for a tank large must, and was wondering if it looks legit because the strap sticks out to me. Specifically where it says swiss made bbc, as usually it says made in france. I have seen some with swiss made, but have yet to see with bbc. But on top of that just a general overview or opinion from anyone would be appreciated. I'm not sure how faked the tank must is compared to solo or older models.If anyone with a tank must can confirm it looks legit i would really appreciate it. Thanks!!

For reasons I'm sure I don't need to explain on this subreddit, I struggle with spontaneity. I don't like last minute changes to my routine or agreeing to big plans without time to think. Positive or negative, I need time to cope with a change of plans or to commit myself to going somewhere. I cancel plans a lot, because my social battery self destructs or anxiety takes over. I say all of this because last week I very spontaneously agreed to fill in for a coworker in 5k one week away. Another coworker I want to impress asked me to join up because she genuinely enjoys spending time with me and they needed someone. I said yes on a whim but had to fully commit within minutes because my schedule would have to be changed. To be clear, I am not a runner. I have recently been getting a lot fitter (I lost 20 kg after a lot of hard work), and I have an active job, but I had never even gone on a single jog when I agreed to do this. I wanted to bail basically every minute afterwards, but I thought it could be a really good test for me and how far I've come. I did a very minimal amount of training this week and just hoped for the best. Yesterday was the big day and I was incredibly nervous. It was a team relay and I was the last one, so I had already watched 4 of my team members complete and look completely exhausted by theirs. I was brimming with anxiety for hours. Everyone knew I had no training and they were nothing but supportive, with no expectations for speed or anything like that, but I was still so scared of not being good at something I'd never done before. But I did it. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done physically and mentally. Less than a kilometer in I was already telling myself I'd made a huge mistake and wouldn't be able to finish, but I kept going. I sped walked a good portion of it, because I didn't have the endurance to keep a steady pace at a higher speed. But i never stopped. I talked myself through it, I used the cheering to bolster me, and I ended strong with my wife and coworkers there to support me. Two of my other coworkers that had already run 5k themselves met me by the last kilometer marker to run alongsidr me and cheer me on and motivate me to finish. I cried for the longest time afterwards from the exhaustion but I DID IT. I did it. I'm crying as I'm typing this, because I'm so overwhelmed by how proud of myself I am. I'm still early in my journey toward diagnosis, I'm still figuring things out, but I pushed myself to do something so huge. I didn't bail or pretend to be sick or give up. This is very rambly and unnecessarily long, so if anyone was kind enough to read this far, thank you. On top of it all, I managed to finish in only 40 mins, and I'm damn proud of that too. I thought for sure I was the last person to finish, but I wasn't 😂

Throw away to keep my identity anonymous. TW for discussion of sexual abuse.
My (23f) boyfriend (23m) have been together for 6 years. Our sex life is non-existent, mostly on my part. I have a chronic illness which has tanked my libido, but on top of that, my boyfriend has just not been helpful in giving me a safe environment to be sexual with him.
You see, I am a csa survivor. For a large portion of my childhood, I was molested and raped by someone who lived in the house with me. It would happen in the middle of the night, when everyone (including me) was asleep. When my parents found out, they removed me from the person, but they did not help me recover from the trauma. My mother continued the sexual abuse. I have been to therapy, and am working on the trauma.
However, it’s led to triggers while being intimate, and I do suffer from ptsd.
My partner knows this and has been graceful about it throughout our relationship. He was always accommodating and our sex life ebbed and flowed. When it was lacking, he was content taking care of himself.
Recently, that’s not been the case.
In the last nine months, he is becoming more intrusive. He constantly makes sexual jokes aimed at me, which I’ve told him makes me uncomfortable. He begs to have sex, and when I say no I’m in the mood, he will beg to pleasure himself in front of me. Again, this is extremely triggering for me.
I’ve expressed my discomfort, and explained that I want to be more intimate, I just need him to slow down around me. I have responsive desire and need more time to develop my arousal. Him begging me or making unwanted advances shuts me down.
Well, last night, I woke up to him touching me.
He does this every so often. He will “help himself” to my body and repeatedly say my name over and over and over again until I wake up- while his touches get more intrusive. He doesn’t stop until I wake up, he further progresses. My assumption is that he took “responsive desire” as “touch me until I say no, and then we know it’s a no.” I have told him not to touch me without asking.
Last night, he rubbed my crotch so hard, there’s a raw spot on my vulva that’s so painful. I woke up, and pushed him off, and asked what the fuck was wrong with him. I only know Hed been touching me for a while before I woke up because of the raw skin and wet spots on my shirt over my breasts.
Today, he’s acting like nothing happened.
I don’t know how to address this.
Our relationship is perfectly fine and normal outside of this. Leaving is not really my option number one. Like I said, the 98% of the relationship is great.
What do I do? How do I get it across that he’s violating me? I feel lost.

How would you describe their dynamic? What effect does it have on your marriage, if any?

TLDR: Girlfriend doesnt acknowledge my needs and feelings. Always brings it back to her. Starting to get exhausted playing too many roles in this relationship.
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Ive currently been with my girlfriend for 8 months and Im starting to feel myself pull away from her. She is incredibly sweet, loyal, great family, lots in common but Im starting to feel that Im doing more to make her happy then the other way around. Now I truly believe you should always get into a relationship to give but I dont really know what Im getting out of this....
Several times we've spoken about our needs in the relationship. Whenever she has told me about her needs Ive always listened and tried to meet them but unfortunately when I speak about my needs, thoughts, opinions and feelings she always reverts it back to herself and what she wants. I told her at one point I felt we were moving fast after she invited me to her brothers wedding 5 months in and she took it immediately as a hit and questioned if we were gonna break up. I reassured her no and cheered her up but once again I was left in the dark...
When she is upset, angry, or sad about something Ive been there to talk to her, reassure her, and open her up so we talk but I feel she doesnt do the same back to me. Its nice when you can have a partner try and open you up as well and try to understand you back.One of needs in a relationship is Autonomy. One weekend I was hoping to do something on my own and after I mentioned it she got super upset and said "She didnt feel like a priority. Dont do that again". I felt criticised and once again misunderstood.
In the relationship Im doing about 75% of the date planning and fun ideas, 100% of initiating sex, and whenever were out for dinner or with each other Id say I have to carry the conversation. In fact one time I deliberately went quiet to see if she could bring up any interesting topics and all she said was "So what else is up?". We had a dinner with her cousin and I was asked about life in my 20s where I told about all my travels and living overseas to which my girlfriend said "I didnt know this" and I thought to myself "Because you never asked..."
I understand that a lot of women like it when men are the leaders and make the decisions for them but after a while thats get super old. Im finding myself not only playing the role of the boyfriend, but the best friend, therapist, date planner, and honestly sometimes the baby sitter. She also lives an hour away through transit so its not super easy for us to just pop over to each others place. She also doesnt have too many hobbies and a few friends (not a local to this city and country).
I do also Muay Thai and yoga 4x a week which make me extremely happy. I would love to do them together but her schedule doesn't always fit with mine and once again I feel that our mismatching schedules is my fault.
Personally I believe that you should always try and meet your needs as best as possible on your own and then once your so called "buckets" of needs are filled others can top them off and you can also focus on topping off your partners needs.
Now she does show her love in other ways like gift giving and acts of service and I always love it and appreciate it but mine are words are affirmations (she knows this) and I never feel encouraged.
Currently I feel myself becoming distant on her and this might sound harsh, but sometimes I dont see her as a woman but as a little girl. And also a big kicker - she also wants marriage and 3 kids in the future where as I dont want marriage and only 1 kid.
If anyone else has had a similar experience please let me know? Sometimes my gut is leading to end things with her.... I know people will say COMMUNICATION but as I stated before I feel its never reciprocated back to me. Relationships are a two way street.

I had a 55 day streak last week but unfortunately after a traumatic incident (thank you to the users who have talked it through with me btw) I relapsed, and have to start again. I am a 30yo husband with 2 kids- I was raised Catholic and re-joined the church last year with my then gf. We then got married last October. Since then I have tried to limit my sexual outlet to just sexual intercourse with my wife.
I am determined to make this streak a new personal best. I also have over a year and a half of avoiding porn, with the support of pornfree and NoFapChristians.
My wife and me only have sex about once a month atm since kids are so young so abstaining has been a challenge.
If any other married (or long term committed) men are struggling with similar issues, or has done in the past, or just wants to chat, feel free to comment or drop me a DM

اسلم علیکم
I planned to post here after just lurking for some time. I am not sure if this is ok to post here, if not then I am sorry (and just go ahead and delete the post).
As the title says, I (27m) am getting increasingly worried to start the search. I do not live in an area with a real muslim community.
Ever since I started my current job, I wanted to take the next step in life and to get married. My family is also getting increasingly interested in my next life chapter of marriage. Alhamdulillah, I was able to stay away from zina even though there were many temptations along the way. I focused on studies and started in tax consulting after getting my Masters.
However, my family basically only ask me when I am going to marry without offering any real help. On top of that they are very happy with a haram relationship that an older brother of mine has with a کافر (he keeps introducing her to the family without even being married). Based on that, they sometimes imply for me to just do the same.
I personally would love nothing more than find a muslimah and to go through a halal wedding process and live a quite and religious life together. I am getting increasingly worried that I will never be able to achieve this as there appear to be no "options" (sorry for this horrible word) here and no help elsewhere.
My abusive father left us some 15 yrs ago, so there is no support here.
A cousin of mine found a wife through some apps, but parts of my family made even fun of that since in their opinions that is something odd. So I am also not sure if I should go that route.
I visit the mosque occasionally since it takes some time to get there. However the Brothers there mostly appear to speak turkish (as it is a Turkish mosque) and not the languages I speak (german or dari). Anyway, I also just go pray and come back home.
Basically, what I would love to know is if there are any ideas you could think of what I can do.
I pray for something to happen and I know that Allah (swt) has the right plan for me. However, I keep delaying starting the search because I have the fear that my conclusion will be to stay alone for the rest of my life. Because whatever might happen, a haram relationship will never be something I will entertain inshallah. Do you have any tips what would to do? As you can guess since I do not really have a real muslim Person of Trust in my life currently, I wanted to ask you all.
جَزَاكَ ٱللَّٰهُ

This week we were introduced to some of my personal favourite lineages and myths, like the Minotaur, the Pleiades, the births of Hermes and Dionysos, Oedipus, the Theban Wars, and Achilles.
In case you haven't seen the posting yet, we are postponing the discussion of the Epitome until after we finish the Illiad.
Summary
Book 3
Part 6 - Cretan and Theban mythology
In part six we're introduced to the lineage of Agenor, his three sones - Cadmos, Phoenix, and Cilix - and his most famous progeny, Europa. Zeus falls in love with Europa, and taking the form of a docile bull, carries her across the sea to Crete. To Europa and Zeus, three sons are born - Minos, Sarpedon, and Rhadamnthys. Agenor orders his sons to go find their sister and not return until she's been found. Telephassa, Agenor's wife leaves with them. Unable to find Europa, they abandon thoughts of returning home. Phoenix settles in Phoenicia, Cilix nearby in Cilicia, and Cadmos and Telephassa settle in thrace. None of them ever return home.
Europa becomes the wife of Asterios, ruler of the Cretans, who adopts her children. When Asterios dies, Minos wants to become king of Crete but encounters opposition. He proclaimed that the kingdom had been granted to him by the gods and to said that whatever he prayed would come to pass. So, Minos sacrifices to Poseidon and asks for a bull to appear from the depths, which Minos will then sacrifice in his name. The bull is magnificent and Minos exchanges it with a bull from his herds, thinking he can trick Poseidon. Angered, Poseidon causes Minos's wife Pasiphae to lust for the magnificent bull. With the help of Daidalos, she enters a wooden cow and mates with the bull. From their union, Pasiphae gives birth to Asterios, who, with the face of a bull and body of a man is the Minotaur.
Catreus, one of Minos's sons, consults an oracle and is told that he will die at the hand of one of his children. As a result, his children flee or are sold into foreign lands. One of these children, Aerope, becomes the mother of Agamemnon and Menelaos. As an old man, Catreus is killed accidentally by his son, who in his grief, is swallowed by a chasm.
Eventually, Telephassa dies and Cadmos seeks the Oracle of Delphi. The oracle instructs Cadmos to found a city, which becomes Thebes. Cadmos kills a dragon and sows its teeth, which become the Spartoi. After a confusing start, the Spartoi go to war with each other and only five survive.
Zeus falls in love with Semele, a daughter of Cadmos, and though Semele is frightened to death, their union results in the birth of Dionysos. Dionysos discovers the vine (wine) and is driven mad by Hera. Dionysos goes on a spree of working women into frenzies, and as a result they murder their spouses and children. Eventually, Dionysos is recognized as a god, paid honor, and brings his mother up from Hades to ascend to heaven in his company.
Thebes goes through a period of instability, with several rulers dying or being murdered, eventually ending when Laios is expelled and Amphion and Zethos build a wall around the city of Thebes. Zethos marries Niobe and they have seven sons and seven daughters, but when she gloats to say she is more blessed with children than Leto, her family is slaughtered by Artemis and Apollo. After the death of Amphion, Laios takes over Thebes.
Laios marries Iocaste, and is warned by an oracle not to have children, or he will die at the hands of his son. Laios gets drunk, and they conceive Oedipus. As a baby, Oedipus is left for dead by Laios but is rescued by a shepherd and raised by the King and Queen of Corinth. Eventually, Oedipus makes his way to Thebes where he kills Laios and his herald, after Polyphontes kills one of his horses. Hera sends the Sphynx to Thebes, who poses a riddle to the Thebans, who cannot solve it. Eventually, Oedipus does and he is given the throne of Thebes and marries his mother. They have four children before they find out that they're mother and son. Iocaste hangs herself and Oedipus gouges out his eyes and is exiled from Thebes. His daughter Antigone goes with him, and Oedipus dies as a suppliant in Attica.
Part 7 - The Theban Wars
Oedipus's son Eteocles tricks Polyneices out of the throne and exiles him. Polynieces ends up in Aros, and eventually becomes part of the seven kingdoms who gather to conquer Thebes. Because so many died during the siege of Thebes, it is decided that Eteocles and Polyneices should engage in hand to hand combat, where they kill each other. Creon succeeds to the Theban throne. As he refuses to let the bodies of the dead be buried, Adrastos enlists the help of the Athenians, who, along with Theseus, capture Thebes, and bury the dead.
Ten years after the war, the Epigoni (sons of the fallen), mount an expedition against Thebes, and successfully take the city. They tear down the walls of Thebes and send the best of the plunder to Delphi as an offering to Apollo.
Part 8 - Arcadian mythology (the Pelasgids)
Pelasgos, sone of Zeus and Niobe, has a son called Lycaon who became king of the Arcadians, as well as fifty other sons by different women. His sons were arrogant and impious, and when tested by Zeus, included the entrails of a slaughtered child in their sacrifices, which sent Zeus into a rage that killed all of Pelasgos's sons, except for Lycaon.
Lycaon is the father of Callisto, who becomes a companion of Artemis. Zeus lusts for Callisto, rapes her and turns her into a bear. Artemis kills Callisto bear. Zeus gives Callisto's son, Arcas, to Maia to raise and turns Callisto into the constellation called the Bear.
Arcas has two sons, Elatos and Apheidas. Apheidas has a daughter called Auge, who is raped by Heracles. The resulting son is left for dead on a mountain side, but ends up being nursed by a deer and given the name Telephos. Telephos becomes the adopted son to the King of Mysia, and on his death, Telephos becomes the King of Mysia.
Part 9 - Laconian and Trojan mythology (the Atlantids)
Atlas and Pleione have seven daughters, who collectively are called the Pleiades. Their daughter Maia sleeps with Zeus and gives birth to Hermes.
Hermes, even as a baby is mischievous. He steals a herd of Apollo's cattle, disguises their hooves with shoes and hides them in a cave. In front of this very same cave, he creates the first lyre from the shell of a tortoise, and invented the plectrum. Apollo accuses Hermes, who is still a baby, and takes him to Zeus to demand the return of his cattle. Hermes denies he took them, but isn't believed and agrees to give the cattle back. Upon seeing the lyre, Apollo asks for it instead of the cattle. While in the field, Hermes made a shepherds pipe, and Apollo offered him his golden staff in exchange for it. Hermes also acquired the art of divination by the use of pebbles from Apollo. Zeus then made Hermes his herald as well as the herald of the gods of the Underworld.
Another of the Pleiades, Taygete, bore a son to Zeus, Lacedaimon. Lacedaimon's grandson, Cynortas married Gorgophone, daughter of Perseus. Their child, Tyndareus, marries Leda. Leda is raped by Zeus in the form of a swan and the same night had intercourse with Tyndareus, resulting in the birth of Polydeuces and Helen to Zeus, and Castor and Clytemnestra to Tyndareus. Clytemnestra becomes the wife of Agamemnon.
Helen is a woman of incredible beauty, and is carried off first by Theseus. Her brothers march on Aphidnai and take her back, along with taking Aithra, Theseus's mother as prisoner. The kings of Greece came to Sparta, including Odysseus, Diomedes, and Menelaos. Tyndareus was afraid to choose a suitor for Helen as he feared it would result in a bloodbath, and so, in exchange for Penelope's hand, Odysseus told Tyndareus to obtain an oath from the suitors that they would come to the aid of the chosen bridegroom if ever he were injured by another with regard to his marriage. Tyndareus choses Menelaos as Helen's bridegroom. Eventually, Tyndareus transfers the kingdom of Sparta to Menalaos.
Electra's son Dardanos married the daughter of the king of Teucros. He renamed the city Dardania, and had two sons. Erichthonios fathers Tros, who changes the name of the city to Troy when he succeeds to the throne.
In Illion, Priam and Hecuba have a son, Hector and Paris, who is left for dead but suckled by a bear and taken in by Agelaos. Paris also obtains the name Alexander. Alexander is warned not to sail for Helen, but he abducts Helen from Sparta, and begins the Trojan war.
Part 10 - The Asopids
Zeus took Aegina, the daughter of Ismenos and Pelagon, and they had a son, Aiacos. Aiacos married Endeis, who bore him two sons, Peleus and Telamon. Aiacos was so pious that his prayers cured the barrenness that plauged Greece.
Peleus and Telamon are exiled. Telamon marries Periboia, who bares a son, Aias. Telemon accompanies Heracles on the expedition against Troy.
Peleus eventually marries Themis, who is prophesied to have a son who will be born to be more powerful than his father. Thetis gives birth to Achilles.
Part 11 - The kinds of Athens
Cecrops, the first king of Athens, had the body of a serpent and a man joined into one. He settled the debate between Athene and Poseidon by testifying that Athene planted her olive tree first. Cecrops lineage eventually produces Adonis.
Adonis, one of the most beautiful men to have lived, captures the hearts of Aphrodite and Persephone. Their feud over his time is settled by Zeus, who splits the year into thirds, granting each of them a third of the year with Adonis. Adonis choses to spend his third with Aphrodite. Adonis is killed by a boar while hunting.
When Cecrops died, Cranaos became king. He was driven out of the city by Amphictyon who took over the throne. Amphictyon was driven out of the city by Erichthonios, son of Athene and Hephaistos. Erichthonios erected the statue of Athene on the Acropolis.
Pandion, son of Erichthonis and Praxithea, became king of Athens. When Pandion died, his sons divided the paternal inheritaance, with Erechtheus becoming king of Athens.
Pandion had four other sons during his time in Megara. Those sons, including Aigeus, marched on Athens, and took the city. Aideus had trouble conceiving children, consulted an oracle, and drunkenly slept with Pittheus's daughter Aithra, who slept with Poseidon on the same night. Aigeus left a sword and a pair of sandals under a boulder, and instructed Aithra that, when her son could move the bolder to obtain the tokens, she should send her son to him. Aithra's son was Theseus.
When Aigeus returned to Athens, he found that Androgeos, son of Minos had defeated all others. Aigeus sent him in front of the bull of Marathon, and Androgeos was killed. When Minos received news of his son's death, he attacked Athens. The war dragged on until Minos was given a seven girls and seven boys to sacrifice to the Minotaur.
On his way to Athens, Theseus cleared the road of its two menaces - Periphetes and Sinos, by defeating them in the same manner they had been killing travellers.
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