Ving rhames in holiday heart

(Verse 1) In the desert sun, a city awaits Tucson calling, where adventure takes shape Mountains rising, cactus standing tall A land of beauty, we can’t help but fall
(Pre-Chorus) So we packed our bags, set off on the road Tucson’s calling, a story to unfold
(Chorus) Tucson, Tucson, the land of dreams Where the sky meets the desert, it’s more than it seems With colors so vivid, under the Arizona sun Tucson, Tucson, our journey’s just begun
(Verse 2) Strolling through the streets, the history unfolds Spanish missions whisper tales untold The warmth of the people, their welcoming embrace Tucson’s heart beats with vibrant grace
(Pre-Chorus) So we’ll explore the town, with wonder in our eyes Tucson’s calling, a treasure we can’t deny
(Chorus) Tucson, Tucson, the land of dreams Where the sky meets the desert, it’s more than it seems With colors so vivid, under the Arizona sun Tucson, Tucson, our journey’s just begun
(Bridge) Under starlit nights, the desert comes alive Serenading coyotes, the moon takes a dive From Sabino Canyon to Saguaro National Park Tucson’s beauty leaves an everlasting mark
(Chorus) Tucson, Tucson, the land of dreams Where the sky meets the desert, it’s more than it seems With colors so vivid, under the Arizona sun Tucson, Tucson, our journey’s just begun
(Outro) As we say farewell, memories in our hearts Tucson’s calling, never truly apart We’ll carry the spirit of this special place Tucson, forever a cherished space

My Apple Watch measures my resting heart rate. Since Oct 2019 when I got the watch, until October 2022 it was always under 60. Then it jumped up to 63 in November, and has been over 65 for the last 3 months. It’s now been elevated for 7 months, higher than any point in the last 3 years.
Some context. I’m just turned 41, I ran a marathon last year, I run about 50km every week. I recently started weight training. My BMI is 21.8. So I’m generally quite fit, fairly slim, and in pretty good health overall.
Despite many rounds of research, including this subreddit, I can’t find any suggestions for what causes sudden increases in resting heart rate. All the research I’ve found talks about a lower resting heart rate being healthier, and tips to get there are exercise and diet. But I find no explanations of what can lead to sudden spikes in resting heart rate or how to address it.
Do you know what can cause a sudden and prolonged bump in resting heart rate? Can you share any references?

I'll give you the TLDR of what happened, but I'll also link below my original posts. We were together 2 years. We were both active sex workers, who were in an open relationship. Our only rules were honesty with one another and protection with others. He raw dogged like 6 or 7 different escorts in our community while actively lying to me. He gave me an STD and let me believe it was due to my line of work. It wasn't. What a joke.
I dated him for 2 years. I told my therapist it was the healthiest relationship I'd ever been in. He was nice to me. I grew up in abusive homes my entire life so nice was enough. He wasn't particularly... Giving or thoughtful. He didn't clean up after himself. I was sick and he wasn't... Patient or understanding, But he was nice. When we broke up I thought I'd be alone forever. I'd only encountered actively cruel men but he was nice. I thought he was the pinnacle of what I deserved.
When we broke up, I told the entire community what he had done. He had a blossoming photography business taking pictures of escorts. His only friends were people in the industry. They were quick to drop him and he lost his business, his friends, and left the escort industry. He had nothing. At the time I wasn't sure if I made the right choice. Now I know I did. He was a sexual predator and a sick Pervert. He threatened and made hints to offing himself. I felt responsible for him and checked in on him daily to make sure he was still alive. Cutting contact was the best thing I ever did. I don't even care if he's dead or alive anymore.
It's been 2 and a half years now. So what have I been doing? After the breakup, I moved back to my home town. Got myself a little one bedroom, in an admittedly shitty apartment. I reconnected with old friends, and family. They supported me mentally and emotionally, my mother supported me financially until I could get myself back to where I wanted.
I did therapy, I got my autoimmune issues sorted, I met a man... We bought a house together on 2 acres. We've got 2 cats and a new dog. On my path to health, my partner has been patient, kind, gentle, understanding. He's given me so much grace on my journey. He tells me how much he loves me, but more importantly, he shows me. I have never met anyone so committed. I have never been with someone who loves me SO much. He's nice, but he's also kind. He has a good heart. He's sensitive. He worships the ground I walk on. Our relationship is bliss.
I just... Listen. Okay. You don't have to accept someone who overlooked your physical or emotional health. You will be okay one day. You'll make it through the pain you're feeling. You have the opportunity to live a more beautiful and fulfilling life. You didn't deserve what happened to you, and the partner who hurt you doesn't deserve your forgiveness if you don't want to give it. I know my situation is unique, but it just goes to show that cheating isn't about sex. It's something sick and twisted. My boyfriend could bang whoever he wanted. I actively pushed for it and he STILL lied.
I guess I wanted to share this more for myself. I've just been feeling so grateful for the path I ended up on. We all deserve better
Original post: https://www.reddit.com/survivinginfidelity/comments/nqso81/my_29f_ex_36m_was_cheating_on_me_throughout_ou?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
Immediately after my split: https://www.reddit.com/survivinginfidelity/comments/ogmdh1/after_his_infidelity_i_outed_my_35m_ex_to_ou?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

first off, i’m sorry in advance for posting so much in here. this place has been so lovely to vent & just tell Keegan’s story. it makes the loss feel a tiny bit less unbearable hearing all your stories as well. although i’d never wish this on anyone
Keegan passed away, rather suddenly, on June 1. i have detailed posts on my page of the timeline of events if anyone is interested in hearing more. i also wanted to link Keegan’s last report from the ER in case there’s anyone else out there who finds some relief in seeing and hearing what happened from a strictly scientific/veterinary standpoint, emotions aside. it looks like a scammy link but it’s the easiest way to share a PDF file: https://beige-franny-63.tiiny.site
the biggest questions i’m grappling with nearly a week and half later are, how & why?
how did this happen? Keegan was in incredible shape with no known cancers, ailments, etc. (besides some arthritis). hours before he started feeling unwell, he was 100% himself. and i can’t exaggerate that enough. how could in less than 20 hours could he go from just your typical senior dog to having to be put down?
if you don’t want to or haven’t read the report, essentially the neurologist was highly suspicious of a tumor within his brain that ruptured and was the cause of his rapid decline, & passing.
typing that out seems too surreal. he had a tumor in his brain that ruptured? how? even more head scratching (from my perspective of thinking he was indestructible) was he exhibited no symptoms, beyond PU/PD (excess thrust and urination) that we got treated by an internal specialist. from suspected Cushing’s disease, to diabetes insipidus, to chalking it up to “psychogenic reasons” (i.e, behavioral / mental health). we found a solution that worked. they were called DDAVP eyedrops that really gave him and us such a better quality of life these past ~2 years of his life.
but beyond that, he never showed any signs of the tumor. no seizures, no weakness in limbs, no abnormal behaviors, NOTHING! we spent Memorial Day weekend (just mere days before) walking him in parks, taking him on a picnic without an ounce of worry something was wrong.
so how could he got from his happy, curious, lovey self to death so suddenly? i did speak to his neurologist & she explained that the growth likely grew too large or even ruptured and basically led to a rapid decline. but just like that? one second he’s fine and the next it’s ruptured? i know she’s the expert who spent hundreds of thousands of dollar on her education and dedicated her life to animals, even more so with a speciality in neurology, but it just seems so unfair. and maybe because he was (and still is) the center of universes, it’ll always seem unfair. he likely couldn’t survive through an MRI or potential radiation and we had to end his suffering.
and my next question is, why? why did it have to end like this? he was 16 and lived a beautiful, long life, but we weren’t done yet. we had so much planned for the summer and beyond. why did the tumor have to rupture/bleed/spread them? he didn’t deserve that. i always thought about the end of his life as he got older in an anticipatory way, but NEVER in my life would i suspect this is how and why’d he’d go.
i know i should listen to the doctors. i spoke to his neurologist, his primary doc, a different ER doc, and even a few vets on here who have the same conclusion— there’s nothing you could’ve done more. but for some reason, i cannot accept that answer. is it my grief? probably yeah, but i feel like i have to keep chasing the answer, for him. you might think “well you have your answer right?” and logic says yes, but my heart is thinking something else had to have happened. it couldn’t be a brain tumor that was seemingly dormant for nearly 2 years. it just doesn’t add up, right?
idk, i feel like i’m losing it and everyone in my life has to keep giving me reassurance. but this vicious cycle of guilt, regret, & “what ifs” is eating me alive. i am seeking professional help to help navigate this & also am starting a support group later this week. i’m trying my best, but truthfully nothing will be able to satisfy this hole in my heart and soul. with every fiber of my being, i love Keegan so much and always will, until the day i go. i just need him to know we did everything we could for him and i hope he doesn’t feel like we failed him.
if you’ve read this post yet again. thank you, and thank you for this community existing to let us vent as freely and as vulnerably as possible. ❤️

This community has been so helpful. I had been on a hormonal IUD for around five years prior to this. I had another one inserted for three years with no issues. This last one, however really put me through it the last six months
In December 2022 I started to have panic attacks out of nowhere, after several of these and my day-to-day life becoming increasingly hard to manage just the simple things I started to journal about it. I started to notice a pattern especially around my cycle although I didn’t have a period I could tell around every 28 days like clockwork, my anxiety would go through the roof , I would have days of just crying, constant, intrusive thoughts, I no longer felt like myself I felt like somebody else. At the points of me, convulsing having heart palpitations several panic attacks a day and suicidal ideation’s, which is absolutely not me, I discussed this in therapy and was urged to see a psychologist. Luckily, my psychologist really listen to me and said she had been hearing things about women who have had IUD is have similar problems and said I should trust my gut and remove my IUD.
The day after I had my IUD removed, I could immediately feel myself coming back. I had more control over my thoughts. My mind wasn’t racing constantly, and I could do simple tasks like dishes, or laundry, and not get swept away. However, I just started my first menstrual cycle since the IUD was removed. My PMS wasn’t that terrible it seemed normal, nothing like when I had the IUD in. Yet now I am four days into my bleeding phase and the anxiety is coming back. Nothing like it was in the worst of days, but still reminiscent of what I felt with the IUD in.
My question for the community is, have any of you experienced anxiety coming back slightly during your period not just during PMS? Did it ever fully go away? I want to believe taking the IUD out was the reason for my anxiety relief, and that this is just a minor setback. The thought of it that type of anxiety being my norm now is horrifying
Thanks for any insight.

TW: abuse, teen pregnancy
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so for the last month ive been feeling really sick and tired but thought it was my period because my periods are sort of bad, but yesterday my boyfriend who lives with me and my family got me a pregnancy test and i took it. The test immediately came up as positive and it felt like my heart was about to fall out of my chest like i felt it beating so hard im sure my boyfriend could feel my heart just by touching me. im also graduated due to me going to an alternative school so i graduate in a week or 2 but my mom wants me to live with her til i graduate college which i really dont want to do school was already a living hell for me i really cant do it all again, i just dont want her to kick my boyfriend out because the reason he lives with us is because his mom is extremally abusive he used to come to my house every night to get out of there and when he would come over he would have black eyes and a busted nose with a sore and red back. im not worried about my dad other than what hes going to do about my boyfriend but other than that he was always there for me when my mom would go crazy like when she slammed the brakes on the car we were in a street away from my dads house and kicked me and my little sister out and drove off cause she was just screaming at us for no reason and got too mad i guess, another things i know shes going to be really bad that the conception happened at our house even if no one was home shes always told me it was disrespectful and i agree with her i feel horrible for breaking her rules i try to be the best daughter but theres always something better i could've done with her no matter what i do. im just really scared and need some help on how to tell her when im so scared of the judgement shes going to give me and the cold shoulder and im going to be yelled at for everything even more now so im just really scared so if anyone has advice i would love to hear it please.

08/01/2022 - 06/03/2023
Total reviewed: 465
Watched on: Max
IMDb
Synopsis: Gods pursue Billy Batson and friends after retrieving a powerful relic.
TASTE THE RAINBOW, MOTHERF---!
Not as terrible as I was led to believe. The next installment in the Shazam franchise finds Billy Batson basking in superhero glory as he and his friends work together to protect their city from malfeasance ranging the criminal spectrum... with varying results. As one of the intentionally sillier installments in the DC universe the over-the-top humor in this one has a better fit than the latest, joke-laden features from Marvel.
Zachary Levi is mostly good in the role but seems entirely different from the kid he's supposed to be. Billy is pretty chill and has a measure of charisma where as Shazam seems like a super-douchey try-hard for half of the film. But the other half he's legitimately funny and even hits the heart a little in the end so I'll give him a pass. Honestly, the worst thing about this film is probably the wooden Lucy Liu who just wasn't doing it for me. I guess after you live thousands of years you maybe just expend the great capacity for any emotion you once had? And talk about greatness--the incomparable Helen Mirren is in this film as well, adding an element of reserved ferocity to the movie that helps me take the bad guys a little more seriously.
The CGI isn't terrible but it definitely isn't the best around with many scenes just looking...manufactured. Several of the stunts are obviously just actors being swung around on wires with little regards to the actual physics of the scene. Other times, a scene just looks layered. The worst offender is that one of the baddies rides around on a dragon (for quite a bit of the movie!) and it just looks like them holding some wooden pommels and then being patched into the scene. Which I know is exactly what it is, but it looks like it. However, there are other parts that look really cool. The fight under the dome was pretty sweet and we have one of more badass portrayals of unicorns I can recall. I mean, if they legit look like that, I fucking want one.
A decent sequel that suffers more from production than product. If you liked the first then I'm sure this one will appeal to you as well.
6.5/10

Hello nosurf
A couple of years ago I posted my "Commandments of Media Use". The list originally had 24 commandments, then 38. Now, it's grown to 52, and will continue to grow.
Well, without further ado, here are The 52 Commandments of Media.
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1.Never to forget that light feeling. When you’ve been away from your screens for a prolonged period of time.
2. Not to underestimate the slow, psychological poison of technology.
3. Not to chase the shadows cast by your screens at the expense of your life.
4. Not to rationalise excessive technology use.
5. To always, at every opportunity, choose the real world and not the digital one.
6. Your body becomes good at what you teach it to do. If you sit still while your mind is lost in the digital world, then your body shall atrophy. After all, sitting still hunched over a computer doesn’t require much muscle tone — so your body will not provide it.
7. Your mind adapts itself to every task, including consuming media. Watching videos will create a passive mind. Social media will create an unsatisfied mind. Internet browsing creates a distracted mind. There is no “this doesn’t count” or “I just do this to relax”. For your mind, every single thing you do becomes a part of you.
8. Not to forget — that human beings are not evolved to sit in a chair and watch screens.
9. Think of those you’ve seen in old videos or in poor countries. Their light, steady gaze and easy smiles. Then think of your own twitchy gaze and stiff smile. Ponder on what you’ve lost.
10. To notice the slow of time when away from technology.
11. Think of your screen-time in days prior. And realise that almost none of it can be remembered. Time poured into a drain.
12. To always approach technology with intention. This will be your anchor as the winds and whirlpools of the digital world pull on your precious attention.
13. The creators of technology who profit from stealing your time.
14. To switch everything off — and remember how it feels to be alive.
15. Even a perfect digital world could never be as satisfying as the imperfect one you were born into.
16. If they were speaking face to face they wouldn’t act like that.
17. The light breeze. The sun on your face. A quiet walk in nature. How they’re all a thousand times more fulfilling than the superstimuli found on screens.
18. Never to digitise your human urges.
19. Incels and Hikikomoris — how technology has trapped them in a looping nightmare.
20. To always remember that the news does not represent the entirety of reality.
21. Their faces as they use their technology
22. To never click unconsciously.
23. To always, as much as possible, act the same in the digital world as you do in the real world.
24. The more dopamine induced by screens, and the higher its potency, the less reality will excite you
25. Screens are not a necessity for a fulfilled life. To think so is an illusion.
26. From the stars in the sky, to the endless detail underneath a microscope, to the strange creatures dwelling in the deepest parts of the ocean, to the emotions inside a person's eyes, no virtual world will ever carry as much detail as reality itself.
27. Like a bolt of lightning or water running downhill, human beings (like all of nature) shall always be inclined to take the path of least resistance. And technology is the fastest, most accessible path to stimulation. Yet as human beings, we have the choice to delay gratification for a greater reward down the road. Only children and dogs are unable to do so.
28. Life is perceived as short by those who spend it on screens.
29. Why do you care? Why do you feel the need to give your opinion? Why does the issue of the day require your input? Why does the business of a celebrity far away concern you? Why do you allow others to decide what you pay attention to and what you don't?
30. When has awareness of world events made you happier? And when has your mere awareness had any effect on these events?
31. Every obscure, specific fetish. Every taboo. Every new piece of pornographic content. All the same. Foot fetish porn. Femdom porn. Rough porn. Public porn. Incest porn. Trans porn. All one and the same thing, with little distinction between them. Not special. Not unique. All producing the very same chemical reaction inside the brain.
32. Gathering yet more information will not get you to where you want to go.
33. All digital experiences are incomplete versions of experiences already possible in reality. Porn an incomplete version of sex. Romantic movies an incomplete version of love. Movies and video games an incomplete version of your life's adventure.
34. No matter the number of options available to you on screens, you can only be in one room at a time.
35. They do not think you beautiful. They think the digital image of you beautiful. They love the pixels transmitted to them by their screen, not you. There's you. And then there's digital images of you. These are entirely separate entities.
36. The dazed feeling after watching television. The scattered feeling after browsing the internet. The feeling of presence when in nature. Choose.
37. The negative emotions they induce in you for their own profit.
38. Like the sheep dog herds the sheep, algorithms herd the humans.
39. If the internet were to fail, if the electricity flow were to stop, if transport grinded to a halt, if supermarkets held no food, if the world's technology failed, what would you do?
40. The more we rely on technology, the more useless we become when it ceases to function.
41. The experts tell you it's fine, or that it's no big deal. But in your heart, you know it is not. Do not so easily hand the intuition you have built during a lifetime of experience over to experts who have never met you. You know what makes you feel good and whole. And you know what makes you feel corrupted. You don't need to ask experts. You don't need it confirmed by studies. You already know.
42. The youth of millions - stolen by screens.
43. The fashion in which you interact with your screens shall determine the course of your entire life. There is nothing trivial about it at all.
44. Level up a digital character inside a digital world and your real self shall level down in direct proportion.
45. The attractive digital people you see on screens do not exist. They are merely representations of people created with pixels or ink on a page. Nothing more than phantoms. The more time you spend gazing at them, the worse your romantic life shall become.
46. Not to check your devices without purpose. When important news arrives, it will reach you.
47. Those who quarrel online do not bicker with people. Instead, they quarrel with figments of their own imagination.
48. The producer remembered and rewarded. The consumer punished and forgotten.
49. You do tomorrow as you do today. Watch porn today, you'll repeat the behaviour tomorrow. Play video games today, you'll play them tomorrow. What you do now is what you'll do in the future. If you want to change, change what you do now. Now. Now.
50. You say: “I just do this to pass the time”. But why are you “passing time” in the first place? Did you forget that your time is limited? Did you forget about your death? Now that you've remembered once again, can you still justify spending another hour on your screens?
51. Which is reality? The chaos on your screen, or the quiet peace in the room that surrounds it?
52. You become the media you consume

I was just at the tiger game. They lost to the d-backs 5-0 and are in a 8 game losing streak. Sound dismal right? But when miggy hit a double and tied Cobbs number of multi base hits, the crowd roared. At that moment nothing else mattered, not that they were being shut out, not that they weren't going to the division, not that they had the worst OPS in the sport. All that mattered was the moment, was the achievement by Cabrera a guy whose been struggling for years.
Th3 majority of baseball isnt about the end its about the journey to the end. Live in the moment! Breathe in breathe out. This may not be the season we had wanted but don't let that take your joy of the game away. Don't let that take your cheers for altuve away. Don't let that take the leap in your heart away after abreu hits a home run.
Baseball is the most beautiful sport on earth, for just one second forget everyone and just cheer on your team even when it's not logical becuase that's the beauty of baseball its illogical, beautifully broken, and yet wonderfully hopeful!

In the small village of Eldor, nestled deep within the ancient forests, a powerful witch named Morgana once resided. She was feared and revered by the villagers for her unmatched magical abilities. However, over time, Morgana's heart grew dark, and she began to covet more power than she possessed.
Driven by her insatiable hunger for power, Morgana delved into forbidden rituals and ancient incantations, seeking to tap into the darkest forces of magic. In her reckless pursuit, she accidentally unleashed a malevolent entity known as the Shadow Lord, a creature of pure darkness and evil.
The Shadow Lord quickly seized control over Morgana, bending her will to his own. He compelled her to cast a curse upon the village, enveloping it in an eternal night and shrouding it in impenetrable darkness. The villagers were trapped within their fears and nightmares, unable to escape the nightmarish realm they now inhabited. full read the article at this link

(I'm writing this because I hope you guys will try out these decks even after this trial ends)
ABYSS ACTORS
First up, everyone's favorite theatre kids, let's welcome the Abyss Actors. This archtype is the most consistent and has the best matchups of the three that I experienced. Your Extra Deck is irrelevant except for your Abyss Actors links. Now here's how the full combo works; you need to get 1 Abyss Actor name on the field and have any Pend scaled. Your best 1 card combo is getting Abyss Actor - Extras on the field, using its effect to scale Curtain Raiser, then SS Curtain with its pend effect and use its monster effect to add back Extras, Link Curtain for Hyper Director and Scale Extras, Hyper Director Special Extras & scales Madonna. DO NOT USE MADONNA FIRST, IT WILL PENDULUM LOCK YOU. Now you MUST first make Super Producer, then you can use Mellow Madonna to search for Wild Hope, scale wild hope and use its effects to change Madonna to a 9 scale, now you can use Super Producer to pop Wild Hope & scale Newbie. (Or you can not use Wild Hope and simply pop it with Super Producer to scale Comic Relief, the archtype Change of Heart) After being popp'd Wild Hope adds Abyss Actors - Superstar. Then you can Pend Summon whatever you have, Superstar is always used to set Abysstainment to recycle your Scripts though. Do remember, your archtype field spell only changes a monster effect ONCE PER TURN, it is not a skill drain like card, but more like Grepha, Overlord of Dark World. Normally, this is used to either draw until you have 5 cards in hand with Opening Ceremony, Bounce 2 with Dramatic Story, or add 2 "Abyss ActoScript" cards from Deck with Rise of the Abyss King.
Abyss Actors really doesn't have much in terms of linear combos except that, just use whatever is available to try and end on Super Producer, a Set Abyss Script, a Pendulum Summoned Abyss Actor, and another face-up card so you can trigger Super Producer on your opponents turn to negate.
Dogmatika
Ah my good pal Dogmatikas, essentially just try and resolve Dogmatika Alba Zoa, unfortunately this will never work in this format where most of the removal are not ED monsters. I suggest you try & end on Alba Zoa + Cart/whatever support card you drew, or do White Knight control. White Knight is reccomended against the mirror because Alba Zoa is a free + 7 against other Dogmatika decks. With both, you should always have Dogmatikamatrix on the field otherwise you ate missing out on a free targeted ED mill & a arc light effect + (if opponent controls monster) add a Dogmatika card. Also, whatever you do, never add Dogmatika Maximus or Fleur when you are in a Mirror, theo and aldin are both just background noise so don't add them on purpose. Dogmatikaturgy is unironically not bad, ending on white knight + Ecclesia + This set trap allows you to turbo Alba Zoa after you used up white knight, 4000 wall is nothing to scoff at after all! Plus, next turn you can recycle Ecclesia to add Matrix to add 2 Dogmatika cards. Oh yeah, you're also never summoning Quintet Magician.
Springans.
Kitt and her mischievous crew! Nothing much to say except get out Gold Sea, make Merrymaker, Make "Champion" Sargas, get Regulus. Pretty boring imo, but can end on Springans Sargas + Champion Sargas + Regulus if you happened to get Springans Sargas. Oh yeah, also, Watch is literally a Rota + Foolish, Tally-ho! is literally a Rota + Monster Reborn (times ≤3) this Deck definitely can end on the best boards, but in all honesty gets outshined by Abyss Actors being able to end on similar boards + having better advantage gain + recursion. Springans got hit so dirty by this decklist it's insane.

I hit a hundred days free from self-harm. I know we already said our goodbyes- I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for making me realize the extent of my self-harm, I'm getting help and genuinely facing the issue for once. You probably in the long run have saved my life. For the longest time I just accepted that yeah,, I may die from cutting too deep or an infection, without seeing the issue in that.
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When you said what you said when you came over it made me reflect… self-harm I always saw as a way to sustain. To protect myself and manage stress. But losing you (even if it was my decision) and hearing how much this hurt made you realize how just… fucked it is. Even though it wasn't your responsibility to do so.
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I don’t want to be hurt anymore- and I don’t want to hurt anyone else like I hurt you. I’m sorry for everything. Dead stop. I can use the excuse that I was addicted or that I was dealing with things- but that doesn't erase that I made no full effort to stop. Harm reduction tactics only go so far when there's no intention to stop. Even when you told me I should bandage/take care of my cuts, I ignored you and brushed it off. Now, I will always be thankful for you helping me change my perspective, even if you're not in my life anymore.
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I am still sorry I put you in a position to feel responsible for and anxious over it. I did not mean to, but that doesn't stop the effect it had regardless. I also know now that I pushed it so far because I without realizing thought, if I could hurt myself and you would stay, that I wouldn't be abandoned by you. Despite you proving over and over again that you were devoted to me.
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I am also sorry for my inconsideration of your obvious distress over something very fucking understandable to be distressed over and brushing off how much pressure you were under when I would ask you to let me self-harm or when I got drunk and would try to. You should not have been put in the position where you felt obligated to be my "savior" and helpless to do anything because I would not let you.I hope you're healing from the hurt I inflicted, and if you aren't that's okay.
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Be gentle on yourself and take your time. I'm just sorry there's something to heal from.You don't need to accept my apology- just wanted you to have closure or just reassurance- and maybe selfishly want to air out my guilt.
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I will always regret what I did to you but it's not on you to fix that. If anything, it's your trauma (or wtv you want to call it) to say how you want to deal with it and what you want to hear from me about it (if anything), not mine to capitalize on.
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I also wanted to tell you I was clean, I guess,, sorry that this is like a book long and I'm just talking about myself
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But I hope you're doing well, I miss you a lot. I wish I could have figured this out before breaking up with you, maybe if I had controlled this better all the stressors that lead to the end would've never happened. my heart still yearns for you, and I feel empty without you. I know this will pass, but I just want the hurt to stop.
Love you,
A

In the small village of Eldor, nestled deep within the ancient forests, a powerful witch named Morgana once resided. She was feared and revered by the villagers for her unmatched magical abilities. However, over time, Morgana's heart grew dark, and she began to covet more power than she possessed.
Driven by her insatiable hunger for power, Morgana delved into forbidden rituals and ancient incantations, seeking to tap into the darkest forces of magic. In her reckless pursuit, she accidentally unleashed a malevolent entity known as the Shadow Lord, a creature of pure darkness and evil. full read the article at this link

Ok so I couldn’t really word that correctly in the title but it’s my third time with Covid, I got all the shots plus boosters but work in retail so deal with a lot of people I have used all of my sick days and have a few days of holidays left so I will use those and get a few days unpaid I approached my boss the second time I had it as to why I couldn’t get the Covid payment
His response
Two components to the issue:
The subsidy $$$ This was paid to the business, for the business. Designed to partly or fully cover the cost of wages and contribute to other disruptions to the business owing to the pandemic.
Use of sick leave Advice was unequivocal – if an employee has COVID they are sick and unable to work (subsidy or no subsidy) – sick leave utilised if balance available. If an employee is isolating as a close contact (no longer applicable) they are not sick and sick leave not utilised.
It didn’t really answer anything Any advice on how to approach my boss on this one I’ve never received Covid leave and have just used sick leave and holidays

so i've just recovered from opioid withdrawals which is cool but i've been abusing the shit out of xanax to help with the withdrawals. i have general anxiety and social anxiety too. now i'm left with extreme anxiety in the mornings, i take 6mgs in the morning which is just enough to be able to get out of bed and get to the gym. coming to midday i take another 3 when i feel it wearing off and i have another 3 before bed when the anxiety starts creeping up. these are genuine tested 1mg xanax tablets and i have a massive benzo tolerance.
today i fucked up, felt my heart pounding from anxiety because i fucked up at work so i've taken 9 xanax (15mg total today) and now i'm just chilling in bed. not high, just relatively relaxed.
what would be the best protocol for coming off xanax and returning to my normal routine of just taking the occasional one or two if i'm having a stressful day at work or going on a date? i used to wake up and get on with my day without a single pill most days but i've had some trauma and abused opioids, now i'm off them i've developed a massive xanax addiction. any advice would be massively appreciated and i'm definitely not going cold turkey as that could be a death sentence.
damn… i remember the day i first tried xanax and one pill would relive all my social anxiety, i could finally go out and socialise and the euphoria i felt because i finally thought i found the magic pill that would fix all my worries was amazing… little didn't i know the dark side of these horrible pills. i really miss those days and wish i never developed such a massive tolerance because i'll never get that same feeling ever again.😔 thanks bros❤️

a couple weeks ago, my roommate brought home some cute baby chicks. i really wanted to call my sister and show her but realized i couldn’t do that anymore. i always thought the most painful part of losing her was mourning all the big stages of my life that she will not be here to see and experience w me… but it seems to be mourning the tiniest of things that i wish to tell her and want her to see; things that nobody else would care abt but her. i often fixate on the loss and the pain from the tremendous hole that was left when she left, but fail to take pride and gratitude in what i have left of her. i have so much of her in me, from her habits, to her laugh, to her hair, to her eyes. my big sister helped shape me, drastically impacting who i am today. every time i look at my reflection, i will see her carrying on through my eyes, always w me. i miss you every single day. my heart will yearn for you as long as im living, only to be fully mended when we reunite again.

Greetings! I'm a single looking for someone who can chat with me often and explore new interests together.
I'm looking for someone who is kind and willing to share his time for a fun/decent conversation with me.
I'm just a simple girl next door. I'm into normal stuffs like lying my ass off at bed watching movies and series.
I love to do outdoor activities too like hiking and do some travels.
I don't want to brag but I am good in cooking and I believe in the saying that
"the way to a man's heart is through his stomach".😍
Do you guys agree with this saying?
Hit me up and let's get to know each other and explore things together!

Today I was in the car and saw a plane in the sky amongst the clouds; I got an immediate flashback to the hieroglyphics of the 2023 paper 1. I then realised that I was travelling from point A to point B in the car — “what if my father is more of a risk taker than Fiona, and breaks the average speed limit cameras?” I said to myself. As we drove by at a significant speed, the hills transformed into triangles with a base of 2 and a height of 8.
I was worried, my heart rate increased; I couldn’t escape paper 1. The exponential increase of my pulse made me wonder what the rate of change of my heart was in relation to my anxiety. I then heard a voice — it was Eoghan O’Leary who said directly to me “if you don’t know what to do, do what you know” - I was then grounded back to reality.